Oh, well!

As expected, my weight was UP at the weigh-in this morning.  The assistant asked me if I knew what to do to get back on track.  The answer is yes.  I know what to do...just have to quit sabotaging myself!

Spent the day working around the house.  It's amazing how much time it takes to putter around and not get anything done!  I did get the bay window washed...and the windows in my new bedroom.  Have been doing laundry, as well.  Took a nap, too.  I like my weekend naps!

I took a run out to Kohl's today for a sale.  Got each of the children a pair of pants and two shirts/tops each.  We are gearing up for Ryan to start pre-school this week.  One other thing that was on sale--and I bought--was a new comforter/bed skirt/pillow shams for my bed.  It's a bright orange and really makes the furniture look nice.  That was a morale booster for me.  My room has looked pretty anemic from the start.

Back to work here...

Self Sabotage

I have pretty much made it known that I have joined the Weight Watcher's program in order to help me take off the 50 pounds that are threatening my health and good feelings.  I've been on the program for five weeks and have lost ALMOST ten pounds.  This week, I am afraid to go weigh in because I have deliberately sabotaged myself.  Yesterday, for instance, I had what would have amounted to a WW lunch at school with me...but I CHOSE to eat the school lunch.  It was a conscious decision.  Why do I do this????

I have succeeded, so far, in staying away from the school's snack machine.  I also have managed to stay away from the candy that the Media Center sells in order to make money for books.  When I come home at the end of the day, however, I am looking for something to eat...which sabotages my supper. 

Meg is much better about this than I am.  I need to figure out what my problem is!  We'll see tomorrow morning how I did this week.  I am guessing no loss.  Just hope I haven't gained!

Three Day Weekend. Ahhhh....

The grandchildren are going camping in Brown County with their father this weekend (but will return on Sunday).  I hate to say it, but it is going to be plenty warm.  Not sure I'd want to be camping in this heat.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, we will work on the house and laundry.  Meg will have homework.  On Monday, we'll try to do something fun with the children.  Don't know what, yet... 

I've thought a lot about this.  My life certainly didn't turn out the way I had planned as a young woman.  Do I have any regrets?  Yes...a few.  However, I wouldn't be the person I am without having gone through the rough patches.  I did as my mother did, and her mother before that--work with the cards that are dealt, and never look back.  I did what I had to do at any given moment.  It wasn't always pretty. 

As unnatural as it may sound, I'm glad that my daughter and grandchildren live here now.  We help each other, and I don't have to miss them.  I don't know how much time God has in mind for the rest of my life, but for now, I am happy that I can live out that time as a presence in their lives...and they make my life so much fuller.

I love it when a plan comes together!

Hello There, Sweet Young Thing!

I saw you in the grocery store parking lot tonight.  Your low slung short shorts, and tummy-tickler tank top that strategically showed the tattoo on your shoulder led me to believe that you are proud of the way you look.  Your legs look fine!  What are you...in your 30s?  Enjoy it while you can, sweet thing.  It ain't gonna go on forever!  Once upon a time, I was in my 30s.  In fact, I still feel like I am, although a quick look in the mirror tells me otherwise.  The wrinkles deepen.  My hair looks like cotton candy.  My right leg is full of spider veins and other varicosities.  There are scars on my face and head that I can do nothing about (except be grateful that what caused the scars didn't kill me). Everything sags.   What I have found is that no one really cares about old people.  And yes, I am now officially "old".  Sweet thing, you will be where I am someday.  God bless you! 

 

Split Three Ways

This was one of "those" evenings where each grandchild had an activity...and the two of us responsible for them had activities of our own, which got put aside.  Meg allowed Ryan to choose who he wanted to take him to his soccer game tonight.  He chose Mommy.  (He told me later, "The next time, I'll choose you.")  Thus, I was elected to take Robin to her first Girl Scout meeting of the school year.  I guess Ryan scored three goals (and didn't lack for an audience since both of the other sets of grandparents were there).  Robin had a good time at GS.  When she and I got home, we launched into homework until her mother got home.  Busy evening!

We started the school day with a convocation that lasted 1 1/2 hours--most of first and second periods.  The presenter was interesting...but not to 8th graders...and I couldn't hear half of what he said even though he was wearing a body mic.  I spent most of the time during the convo keeping kids in line.  That tends to spoil things for me. 

The rest of the day went okay, even if I was aware that tomorrow will be a marathon with our yearly Back to School Night for parents.  That will make me tired for the rest of the week...

When I got home this afternoon, I watched a little of Dr. Phil before picking up the children.  Put Robin's bed linen (due to a wet bed) in the washer--which meant folding what was in the dryer and putting the stuff in the washer in the dryer.  (You know how that goes...)  Came home and got the children fed...put the linen in the dryer...got Ryan prepared for soccer and Robin prepared for Daisy Girl Scouts (which meant also preparing the snacks that we were signed up to bring).  When Meg got home, she had barely enough time to grab a sandwich before leaving with Ryan.  Robin and I made a run to the grocery store, then went to her meeting.  After the meeting, "we" did homework.  The pattern seems to be that Robin will have a math paper, a story to read, and (of course) spelling.  I made Robin's lunch for tomorrow.  No one got baths tonight, including Grandma.  Oh, well! 

In the natural order of things, Meg should be married to a man who would care for her and the children.  *I* should be married to someone who would care about my life, and accept my care for his, in return.  I gave up on that long ago!  In the absence of the Perfect Life, Meg and I are eking out a living on our own.  There are probably people who think I do too much.  Those people generally don't have a clue what it takes to take care of two children!  For the record:  I don't do more than I want to do.  Meg is working full time, taking classes, and trying to raise two young children.  What worries me is what will happen when I croak.  At this point, she adds to the income and I add to the home support.  We are doing the best we can. 

Does any of this help with ham radio?  Uh...no.  When and if my computer gets fixed and I can find myself in my own room instead of the living room with Meg's, we'll see if I can get on HF more.  In the meantime, life goes on!

Sadness

I am sad tonight, and I'm not sure why.  I am watching the closing ceremonies of the Olympics.  Can that be part of it?  Wish I knew.

There is something sad about working hard all weekend and not bringing closure to anything.  I did get the porch light fixed.  I did get a kitchen junk drawer cleaned out.  I got the rest of Robin's Daisy Girl Scout flower petals ironed on her Daisy tunic for her first meeting of the year tomorrow...and I got Ryan's soccer uniform cleaned and in the "soccer bag" for his second game--also tomorrow.  I got most of the laundry done.  Not bad for two days, but I want more.

I want, somehow, for things to be organized enough that we can get up to a relatively orderly house each day, and keep it that way.  I want more time to have fun with my grandchildren, so that things don't have to be so rushed all the time.  I don't want the Almighty Schedule--all of ours--to rule our lives.  I guess I'm sad that the summer is over...and that my granddaughter is in school full time...and that there is so little time to do the things that I always WANT to do with them, but can't.  Life is too short.

My friend Patrick, home from his brother's funeral in Kansas City, has to be feeling some of this, too.  It just goes by so fast...

I have lots of wishes...but as my mother used to say, "If wishes were horses, beggars would ride."  I didn't understand it much when I was a kid.  Still don't, really...but I guess it means something to the effect that hollow wishes mean nothing.  Make it stick.  Make it work.  Do something to make wishes count.  In that regard, I have to say that I have hung in there.  I don't give up.  I just keep pluggin'.  Need to get a t-shirt with that on the front...

At least next weekend is a 3-dayer.  Yay! 

First Things First

Meg and I went to weigh in this morning.  I am .2 pounds away from being down ten.  <sigh>  Maybe next Saturday I can rejoice in having lost ten pounds.  Ya know, I can tell a slight difference in the way I feel, but I sure don't look any different.  Just goes to show how far I have to go...

I felt like an old lady this morning.  Everything hurt.  I have weakness in my right hip. Can only raise my leg so far, which is problematic because it causes me to trip on things I try to step over.  (Haven't fallen yet...but there is still plenty of time for that.)  I think, somehow, it is tied into a back problem.  IN ANY CASE, after we got home from WW and grocery shopping, I took an aspirin and took a nap.  Big improvement when I got up!

Believe it or not, we are STILL in the "pitching" stage of getting the house together...with the last bastions being my bedroom and closet, the kitchen, and the patio.  I feel awful that I have amassed so much junk through the years.  Amateur radio is the worst offender.  I have so much radio stuff that I don't use, I actually have found things that I don't remember acquiring, and have no idea where they came from!

Meg has spent most of the afternoon/evening working on homework for her latest class:  Indiana Geology.  Lots of terminology to learn.  It's an online course, so she has been watching boring online videos of professors talking about the geology of our state.  It sounds interesting, but one has to get past the jargon in order to make sense of it all. 

Tomorrow, Meg is collecting the children early for a visit to her father's campsite somewhere near Cloverdale.  I will just keep plugging here.  Have lots of stuff to do...

I Survived

Survived the first full week of school.  Survived being around my ex for a grandchild's soccer game.  Survived! 

I am working around the house this evening, but my heart isn't in it.  I'm tired.  Meg won't be home from the Muncie trip for awhile.  I will wait up for her.  (I'm a mom.  Some things never change!)

Another Day...

I don't know why, but my patience level has been low today.  The house is still cluttered, which works on me.  I have a class that is going to test my patience.  That works on me.  My grandchildren, whom I adore, can't seem to make it the one mile from their other grandparents' to home without fighting in the car.  That works on me.  I get weary toward the end of the work week...and am still trying to build up a little back-to-school stamina.  I tell myself that it all takes time and that I need to be patient.  (See the first sentence.)

I was talking to a friend on the radio on my way home from school today.  We actually passed each other on the road, but he said something like, "You sound distracted, like you are on the phone or something."  The truth is, I was just all talked out.  I didn't have anything witty to say, nor was I in the mood to make smalltalk.  My fault for answering him on the radio.  I stopped for gas, then turned off the mobile so I could just make the short rest of the way home for the few minutes of solitude I would have before picking up the children. 

Since school has started, our supper meals have suffered.  I am trying to come up with WW meals that will fit the program AND come up with things that the children will eat.  Ryan has pretty much nixed all vegetables.  Robin has nixed anything with onions or tomato sauce.  Meg will only eat certain veggies and fruits.  I am an omnivore.  This week, Meg has been staying later at work, so we have been eating without her.  I notice that the children (at least Robin) has eaten voraciously when served.  It doesn't work to wait until Meg comes home to have her fix supper.  We gotta do what we gotta do.  We get by. 

Meg has started another college class, which means that she needs to spend her weekends doing homework when the children are in Muncie on the weekends.  Another adjustment.  I just plan to do what I need to do to feel better about things! 

Tomorrow is the funeral for Major Pat's brother.  I know Patrick feels bad that he didn't get to KC to visit his brother before he passed...but I do remember a comment made to me when my own father died in 1994.  It was just before Easter.  I had a solo in an Easter cantata at a church in Putnam County.  I sang on Friday.  My dad died that night.  I was to sing again on Saturday, and decided to follow through before leaving for Illinois.  When I mentioned to one of the cantata people that my father had just died, she said, "How wonderful!"  Huh?  "Last night, your father couldn't hear you.  Tonight, he can!"  It made all the difference in the world to me!  Patrick, if you truly believe in Heaven, then you have to know that whatever transpired on this earthly plane no longer matters to Boyd.  "The former things have passed away."  He now has perfect understanding.  WE are the ones who suffer...not him! 

God bless my friends and loved ones. 

 

 

Hump Day

Today was Picture Day at school.  Since English is a subject that everyone takes, the pix are taken during English class.  Hence, I wasn't able to cover my whole lesson plan today--which, basically, is ISTEP preparation.  (ISTEP is the state's competency test.  Don't know why I bother!) 

When I went to pick up the children at Grandma Judy's, Ryan was throwing one of his notorious fits.  He had played nicely all day, but the minute his sister arrived on the scene, there was competition.  Something happened that he didn't like, so he was acting up, and Judy looked like she was at the end of her rope.  He decided to come to me and started talking about finding a live cicada.  He was totally civil and the "fit" instantly stopped.  Judy and I gave each other "huh??" looks.  I told her I was glad that I wasn't the only one that observed his tantrums...

Tonight, while Meg worked with Robin on her homework, I took Ryan outside to help clean up around the sandbox.  (Needed for a LONG time.)  He did a lot of work for a little guy.  After Labor Day, he will start pre-school at the church, so Judy will have a little respite, and he will feel less like a shadow of his sister. 

Meg is doing overtime work these days...not as bad as we'd thought, so far.  In any case, life at home is still chaotic, but we are hoping that everyone understands how much we love them. 

My dear friends Patrick and Carmella, and family,  are in Kansas City tonight to prepare for the funeral of Pat's brother, Boyd.  Boyd had his problems in life, but it is never a good thing to lose a sibling unexpectedly.  God bless my friends!  Having lost my own brother a couple of years ago, who would not communicate with us by his own choice, I understand the hurt.  Every day, we get by. 

Not Enough Time in the World!

After yet another day of working on her room, Meg's "sanctuary" looks good.  She is a bit anal retentive about organization, so I am hoping that her new room will work out for her.  She has a lot in there...and it isn't all that big...but it seems bigger than when I lived  there.  I had too much bed, I think!  My own room needs the same kind of attention, but it will have to wait until next weekend, I guess.  So much to do...so little time!

I have set up a gym bag for Ryan.  He prefers to call it a "soccer bag".  I guess I am off duty for tomorrow's practice.  My ex and his wifey will be picking the children up from Grandma Judy's and taking them out to eat and to soccer practice, where Meg will meet them.  I'll take a nap and enjoy my couple of hours of freedom!

The children came home this afternoon a little out of whack.  Robin was upset because they were watching "The Incredibles" on DVD in the car, but that got interrupted when they arrived on our doorstep.  Ryan seemed a little stand-offish, too.  In short order, I put food in front of them...and they ate like there was no tomorrow.  Things settled down after that...sort of.  Robin and Megan went to Meg's storage unit to check on some scrapbooking stuff while Ryan and I stayed home.  (He was acting up at the time.)  Meg found her stuff, thankfully.  (In case you aren't into scrapbooking, I'll tell you that the stuff is expensive!  Meg was afraid it was lost forever in Muncie...)

What did I accomplish today?  Hmmm...a big chunk of laundry, some organizing...um...where does the time go??

Yay, Weekend!

I was up somewhat early for a Saturday.  We went to WW to weigh in (success!) then came home to the mess here.  Meg has worked all day on her room...organizing and trying to find places for everything.  I got the new patio burner put together and puttered around.  Caved in for a nap along about 3:30, then Meg and I went to Wal-Mart for some stuff. 

One of the things we came home with was an over-toilet storage deal for the bathroom in Meg's room.  I put it together...sort of.  Came down to one of the last steps and discovered that a shelf I was supposed to install didn't have any pre-drilled holes...and those holes are important.  Thus, the unit isn't done.  I have emailed the company, hoping for a quick answer.  We'll see.

I haven't been on HF radio in so long I think people are giving up on me.  Although my radios are set up, the rest of the room isn't...and there are still other projects going on.  Soooo...I don't have much spare time.  I hope things change in the near future.  I need to increase my presence on HF!

As we bring things into the house, my rule is that something has to go out.  Meg bought a neato printer that prints pictures, scans copies, etc...  The printer and scanner already here may go into my bedroom if I can get my computer working.  Once again, we'll see...

Time for bed.  Past time for bed.  G'night.

 

 

Three Days Down; 177 to Go!

Trying to get back in routine is tricky business.  I have to get used to my new school schedule and have to get used to the discipline of the getting up and helping get the children ready to roll again.  Ugh!  I survived this week, but it isn't a good gauge of how things will be because I only had students three days. 

When I picked up the children from Grandma Judy's this afternoon, I took them to Burger King for fast food, then got Ryan ready for soccer practice.  Full uniform...and didn't he feel special!  He told me he was a "world champion".  Meg met us at the field.  She got to see her little guy in action for the first time.  He was a star!  Although Ryan is only four, he is a head taller than everyone else on the team.  His skinny little legs are longer than everyone else's...and although he isn't a particularly coordinated runner, he was in there pitching in everything "coach" asked him to do.  They had a scrimmage with another team.  Ry was the only one who scored a goal!  Yay!  His sister was sitting in bleachers apart from the rest of us, cheering "Go #5!"  This is his opportunity to shine without being in the shadow of his big sister. 

The children have been delivered to Muncie.  There is much to be done around here.  I'm tired already!

My Heart Aches

Okay...so I've whined all summer about things at home, and now it's back to the grindstone.  Today, on the second day of school with students, I had some of my kids fill out index cards with information about them:  their age, who they live with, their favorite subject and worst subject, their passions...and the last question is always open-ended:  if there is something I should know about you, write it now.  In past years, I have had kids tell me about physical disabilities, parental divorces, etc.  This year, some of the responses--and I only did it in three classes--broke my heart.

One youngster is living with his grandparents.  He confided that both of his parents are in jail.  One gets out this month; the other in five years.  One young lady is living with an aunt.  She and all six of her siblings were taken away from the parents due to physical abuse.  (They aren't all living together.)  Yet another young lady, for whom I have a soft heart because I had her brother last year, wrote that her parents were in upheaval about staying together or splitting up, that their power was off, and that her father had attempted suicide in front of her several times.  (One of our teachers drove by a police stand-off at their house just weeks ago...with Dad handcuffed and on the ground.) 

The one that bothers me the most, however, is one from a class that didn't even write cards for me.  Here is the fifth youngster in a family that I have had in class since 1990.  (There are two more to follow.)  They are all "B" students...quiet and proud and unassuming...yet there is no adult in their lives.  The father left, under fire, years ago.  The mother, I guess, was kicked out by the kids a little bit ago...an addict who was making their lives miserable.  These young folks take care of each other--and always have.  They don't ask for anything or even play on others' emotions.  They just quietly go on with their lives, scraping by as best they can.  My heart aches for them all.

Oh!  I forgot one youngster whose mother and sister were killed in a car wreck about five years ago--but I don't ache for him.  His aunt, who lived in Texas with her husband and family at the time of the crash, uprooted everything and came back to take on her sister's two surviving children because that was what she hadpromised to do.  She is a great substitute mom.  May God bless her for her love and loyalty!

Meg, if you are reading this, stop worrying about your babies!  They are surrounded by people who love them.  They have healthy diets, good clothes, rooms of their own (finally), toys galore, and no threats to their security.  They are churched.  No one is in jail.  No one has tried to kill themselves.  No one is so out of control that their well-being is jeopardized.  Things are hectic, for sure...but everyone's needs are covered in fine style. 

I'm not promising that I won't continue to whine, but I am saying that my problems seem small compared to those of some of my eighth graders.  Yes, dear readers...we are only talking about 13-year-olds here.  Is it any wonder why society is going to Hell in a handbasket??

 

Blah!

Last evening, I typed in a big long blahhhhg about Ryan's first soccer practice and my first day back at school.  It didn't save, so those of you poor saps who actually read this were spared the gory details.  I spent the last two days at school, sans students, preparing to start to commence to begin the school year with some sanity.  (Last year, I missed the first three weeks of school because my doctor was afraid I wouldn't hold up after the brain deal.) 

In any case, tomorrow is Robin's first day of first grade.  We spent the evening giving baths and labeling all of her stuff with her name...and gathering lunch materials together.  I think she's excited.  I KNOW she is tired.

Yesterday was also the children's first day with the Heffelman grandparents as day-caregivers.  Everyone was calm and happy when I picked them up.  Great day!  Today, however, I noticed that Grandma and Ryan were playing a game on the patio, but that Grandpa had moved to the middle of the yard to do his reading.  (Ryan was being too loud in his game chortling.  Robin was inside messing things up.)  Grandma looked a bit weary.  Judy has built teepees in her back yard and intends to make Native American outfits for the children, complete with feather headdresses.  Well!  Robin can't wait for that.  She wanted to see the feathers NOW.  And so it goes.  Tomorrow, once Robin is delivered to school, Judy will only have one child to worry about.  I'm wondering if she isn't already regretting volunteering for the child care biz...

I am as prepared for kids at school as I am going to be.  Let the games begin!

What a Long Strange Trip It's Been

My summer is officially over.  Tomorrow, I put on my teacher hat for at least one more school year, and the grandchildren will be starting a new routine.  I wish I could say that all of the projects in and around the house were done.  They aren't, of course, but we have come a long way from where we were in May when all of this started.  I take some satisfaction in that.

Meg starts mandatory overtime tomorrow for about the next three weeks.  It will be good for her paycheck, but harder on her.  We will all have to go into Survival Mode.

Yesterday morning, we went to weigh in at Weight Watchers.  My loss was disappointing, but still a loss.  (Meg did better.)  We didn't stay for the meeting because we had the children with us and had lots to do--starting with shopping.  Since we were in the neighborhood, we stopped at Meijer in Camby.  Spent tons of money on food, school shoes for Robin, a clock radio for me...and other things that are needed to start organizing the closet in my bedroom.  Came home and took the children to Chuck E. Cheese for a late lunch, then back home for a late nap (for all of us!).  In the evening, the children were just nuts.  Nuff sed.

Today, we tried to get the children to tidy up their rooms.  No luck.  Then we went to "Sundae Sunday" at Robin's new school...an opportunity to meet the principal and the teacher.  Robin acted like a total dork in front of her new teacher.  Later, she said, "I'm scared".  Meg is concerned that Robin doesn't show any interest in reading and is resistant, and that she hasn't spent enough time with her in educational activities this summer.  Well, of course!  Guilt is the "gift that keeps on giving"!  (From an old Hallmark card ad...) 

Soon after we returned from the school event, I took off looking for shoes.  I have been wearing the same pair of slip-on shoes for at least a year--including during lawn mowing.  I have been promising myself since before summer started that I would replace them, but never took the time.  I think the condition of my footwear indicated the lack of care that I have taken of myself; however, in my own defense, I have looked in three places for something that would work--to no avail.  I had already looked at Shoe Carnival in Greenwood when we were there last week, but decided to try Plainfield's Shoe Carnival.  Voila!  The place was crawling with people buying school shoes for their kids...but not too many in the Old Lady's department.  Since they were having a sale, I got another pair, too.  Wow!  

And since I was in the same shopping area with the Fat Lady store, I took a stroll looking for some school clothes.  Well!  It is always shocking seeing onself in a dressing room mirror!  I actually bought some threads.  Spent a whopping $115 on some needed duds, plus $60-something on the shoes.  Whoop-de-doo!

I have noticed that the robins are scarce earlier than usual this year.  I hope that doesn't mean that there will be a wicked winter.  Meg and I are planning a Florida trip for December.  I want to get there and back safely. 

So now, it is time for this grandma/teacher/radio operator to hit the sack.  Don't have to be at school until 8:00, but will be starting the new routine. 

God bless all of you who have helped with our house project--and those who have simply read this blog while I whined endlessly.  I owe so many so much! 

The Attack Toilet Seat from Hell

This is going to sound funny, unless it happened to you!  Because our toilet seat in the main bathroom needs to be tightened, it sometimes shifts after we first sit down on it...and, if we aren't careful, it can pinch the back of the right leg.  It happened to me today...and it actually cut my leg!  It bled, for Pete's sake!  Guess who will be tightening the toilet seat??

Had a good day today.  My neighbor backed his pick-up truck into my driveway, and we started loading it with stuff to go to the dump.  It wasn't a huge load, but it consisted of stuff I was not going to be able to put out for regular garbage collection--and I'm so happy to have it gone!  FINALLY, the front of the house is devoid of the junk that has been there since May!!

One of the items that went was a patio burner that was burned and rusted out.  The children do so love to roast marshmallows in there that I determined to get another on the way home.  The one I got was on sale at Lowe's--smaller and more decorative--and included a cover to help preserve it from rain.  I haven't put it together yet, but I felt good about it.  (Robin told me that all the yard needs now is a swing set.  She's right!)

This evening, we went to the Plainfield United Methodist Church for our annual fish fry.  We met up with the Heffelman side of the family, as usual.  The children got to see their cousins Joey and Jackson for the last time before they head back to Georgia tomorrow morning.  After dinner, there were games for the children--with trinkets for prizes.  You'd think the kids had hit the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow!  When we got home, they played with their trinkets until we finally had to order them to bed.

I weigh in tomorrow at Weight Watchers.  Hope I didn't sabotage myself by eating fried fish tonight.  We'll see!  Have to shop for school shoes for Robin tomorrow...and groceries.  Then there is the never-ending laundry to do.  School starts Monday!

 

Mea Culpa

When the children came home from the State Fair yesterday afternoon, we waited for their mother to come home before eating Robin's birthday dinner and giving her just one more gift.  I think she had a very nice 6th birthday.  May she have many, many more!

I was tired.  About the time I got supper on the table, I realized how I had been flying around all day, accomplishing little more than some grocery-and-present shopping, preparing the meal, and getting my hair cut.  I did pick up some paint and a dowel rod in order to work on Ryan's closet, but didn't get too far on that.  'Tis ever thus.

Meg and I got sideways over some stupid little thing last evening after dinner, so I decided to go watch TV in my room while reclining on my bed, at 7:30.  I conked out.  I woke up a couple of hours after that--my body obviously deciding that my nap time was over--but it was too late to get up and too early to be asleep for the night!  Thus, I was awake and looking at the clock every hour.  I hate when that happens!

Today, nothing went right.  Ryan was a whiny pill.  (I think he was bored.  My fault.)  He got angry with me when I didn't hear him call me for bathroom assistance because I was talking to his other grandmother on the phone on the patio.  (Although he saw me on the phone and I told him I'd be right in, that was my fault, also.)  The children fought, with Robin as the aggressor most of the time--which is unusual.  (Probably also my fault.)  My fault?  I was actually trying to get things done.  I tried to enlist the children's help, but I was turned down or ignored every stinkin' time.  I ignored my own rule which is, when things aren't working, one has to suspend that effort in an order to bring things back to "more normal".  (Define normal!)  I was told "You're mean!" on so many occasions today, I could write a song about it, if not put it on a t-shirt.  Heh heh...when my daughter was young, I said I was going to have a t-shirt made that said, "Just so we understand each other, EVERYTHING IS ALL MY FAULT."    I've had people scold me for wanting to take the blame for things I didn't do...but they failed to understand my motive.  I figure that if I just say something is my fault, the other party in the argument will have no further fight.  Finger-pointing will stop, and we can move on.  I may still have that t-shirt made!  And I'll have a couple made for Robin and Ryan that say, "It's Grandma's fault".  Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa!

Tomorrow, if things go well, we will be taking a pick-up truck full of stuff to the dump.  Then, if there's time, I will take the children to school with me to take a look at my classroom.  I don't like going in "cold" on Monday but have done it a number of times.  Then, in the evening, the Methodist Church has their annual fish fry.  I'm still trying to figure out what I can have to eat.  Everything is fried! 

I've been kind of "down" all day.  Bad haircut.  Nothing done.  Harried, with children.  I'll survive. 

Big Day Ahead

The children are off to the state fair with their other grandparents and cousins.  Grandma Peggy has a lot to do in their absence.  Will be cooking a corned "beeth," Robin's choice for birthday dinner, and trying to finish bedroom closets so that things can be sorted out where they belong (instead of all being in my bedroom). 

The Heffelman grandparents wanted an early start so they could see the hot air balloon launch at the fair.  Said they would pick up the children by 5:45-6:00 AM.  That meant we all went to bed early.  Or at least MOST of us did.  Robin couldn't get to sleep and was in my room about every hour until finally, along about 12:30 AM, I ordered her to crawl in with me because I was TRYING to sleep.  She's going to be a tired baby at the fair today.

Off for my first errands.  Busy, busy...

Frustration

I have spent the last 1 1/2 hours trying to get Little Miss Robin to bed.  She is so tired, she can hardly see straight...but she is crying because Grandma is being mean to her.  (Right.)

I started the day hoping to get the children's closets cleaned out so we can finally get everyone's clothes in the right room in time for school.  Had to run an errand or two.  The kids were mostly good, but it was clear that they were too tired to do much store hopping.  And Grandma didn't get the closets cleaned out.  Later in the afternoon, they decided to play nicely together in Robin's room, but by then, it was time for me to fix supper.  I had to run out for a couple of hours this evening.  When I got back, Ryan was in bed, asleep.  Meg was up working with Robin on the Internet Webkinz site.  Meg has to be in Muncie early in the morning, so she hit the sack, leaving me with a frustrated (tired) child who was trying to put her Webkinz "pets" to sleep--and I didn't know how to help.  We went round and round.  When I tucked her in, she was asking for food, saying she hadn't "had much dessert".  Too bad, says I!  I have visions of homework wars when she starts 1st grade.  Tonight's episode was foreshadowing.

In our remodeling/redecorating/moving-in process--which has been going on since April--everything that once was in the garage was moved to the patio and the front of the house.  Much of it is junk that just needs to be sorted, but there hasn't been much time for that.  Thus, the patio has been unusable, and the front has been unsightly.  And now, having lived with it being damaged by rain and general neglect for all these months, I'm just ready to pitch it all.  Good Neighbor Fred offered his truck to haul stuff to the dump on Friday.  (We threw in as much as we could back when the dumpster was here, but still had a lot to clear out when it departed!) 

At issue right now is the fact that everything that we need or want to keep has to have a place to be.  Since the closet in my bedroom is huge, a lot of that is going in there.  Right now, it has been largely just deposited there with no organization, spilling out into the rest of the room.  I need another month off from school to get it all fixed up, but that isn't going to happen, so I am just going to do a bit at a time to find places for everything.  Worked on that a LITTLE this afternoon.  ("A little" means "barely made a dent.")

Okay...so those of you who read this have listened to me whine for months now and are, I'm sure, tired of it.  So am I!!  So, just for now, let's focus on what I DID accomplish today.  I found the kitchen table!  We actually all ate together at the table, with not much clutter in the way.  The living room has been essentially de-cluttered.  I did two loads of laundry, got Ryan's soccer shoes exchanged for a bigger size, fixed a decent dinner, and got a haircut scheduled for Wednesday.  Oh...and in between, took care of the children.  

Have I been on the radio?  No.  But soon, I hope. 

Oh...by the way...Robin is STILL awake.  <sigh>    

Robin Michelle

Robin...aka Robinna...aka Beana, Beanie, Beanie-Weenie, Shelly-Beans, etc., celebrated her family 6th birthday party today, although her actual birthday isn't until Wednesday.  Grandma Judy reserved a gazebo at Hummel Park for a luau birthday party.  Everyone that was supposed to be there came.  Robin had a fine party!  I love this child and she knows it.  Thankfully, the house is quiet now.
Meg worked hard this weekend.  She did endless laundry, cooked the pineapple birthday cake (and decorated it).  She helped decorate the gazebo to make Robin's 6th birthday special.  Crazy times to come.  She will be doing mandatory overtime about the same time that I have to go back to school, as will Robin.  Ryan will be going to pre-school at the United Methodist Church three days a week, mornings.  Grandma Judy will be providing the day care.  It takes a village...
With only a week left before I have to return to school, things telescope... but I have decided not to let it get me down.  I will just set a daily goal that isn't impossible to reach...and work toward it.  God will help.  My very existence after last summer's scare is proof of that. 
Time to hit the sack before the sack hits me!

Another Long Day

Meg and I went to weigh in at WW this morning.  I'm down another almost-3 pounds.  She is down considerably more.  We just keep working on it.

After WW, we went to the Flower Factory in Greenwood for party things.  (Robin's family birthday party is tomorrow (today, now) at Hummel Park.  Came home, napped, and did grocery shopping and cleaning.  The job is never done.

I am done for the day.  I need another summer!  <sigh>

 

One Week, and Counting

I spent much of the day rearranging the kitchen in the absence of the table that used to hold the microwave.  It will work, for now.  My microwave is a Kenmore, circa 1981.  It is huge, but still works.  Time to retire it...but Meg tells me to wait until we can afford to have one built in over the stove.

Meg got accepted into IUPUI's College of General Studies today.  I didn't think much of it because she has done well in her courses this year, but she assures me that it is a big deal for her.  She won't have to meet with a counselor, etc.  She continues to amaze me with her attention to detail, etc.  You go, girl!

Little Ryan will start soccer on the 11th of August (Monday).  That is also my first day of school, and Meg's first day of whacko stuff at work.  Still, he has looked forward to this all summer.  I think it is his first opportunity to shine apart from his sister.  Will he shine?  Doesn't matter!  I hope he loves it!

I have spent zero time on HF this past year.  Major Pat is devoid of hope that I will ever get back on the air.  Patience, my dear friend...patience.  My grandson announced to everyone the other day that I am a teacher and a radio operator.  His words.  Don't know where it came from, but you get the picture about what is important to him.  (He's four!)

I have one week before returning to work.  I wish I could say that everything is done around here, but it isn't.  Maybe by spring break??

Cheers! 

Gone...and Back

Went to see my sister in Springfield, IL, this weekend...with grandchildren.  It's been awhile since they have all seen each other.  In my estimation, the visit was a success, if only on our side.  The children spent two days in Shari and Roger's swimming pool, with and without cousins.  They were plenty tired when we came home!  We ate well, had a good time, delivered some family things to that side of the family, and generally enjoyed ourselves. 

So many more things to say, but too tired to say them!  I learned things about my grandkids.  Learned to accept my situation.  Loved being there and would like to go back sometime soon.  Nuff sed for now!