First of all, today would have been my brother's 56th birthday. Unfortunately, he died almost four years ago at age 52 of a sudden and massive heart attack. I still think of him every year on Halloween.
I had a SATERN meeting in Chicago part of yesterday and part of today. Left the house on Friday AM to drive up there, in the rain. In spite of precip, it went okay until I approached I-80 westbound. Suddenly, traffic in front of me came to a roaring halt. I had to brake quickly...then looked in the rear-view mirror to watch the traffic behind me take to the shoulder to avoid hitting me and others. Whew! Been there...
The rain got worse as I worked my way around the city on the I-294 tollway. Visibility was bad. I just stuck to my lanes and prayed a lot. Finally found my way to the Holiday Inn in Rolling Meadows. Saw a couple of people that I knew and tried to check in, but the room wasn't ready yet, so I went out to find lunch. That's when the monsoon REALLY hit. Figures.
I got a little wet going into the Old Country Buffet. Guess what I discovered? There are a whole bunch of "old people" (like me) who were eating alone. Pretty sad, really...
Our meeting was grueling. Most of the people in attendance had already been there all week for another function and so were already pooped. We ground out a lot of stuff in a number of hours, ate well, and retired as soon as we could. My bed in the motel was probably the MOST comfortable accommodation I have ever had in all my years of moteling...
The trip home was uneventful, if long. Got back just in time to set things up for the trick-or-treaters. Lit the pumpkins, raked the leaves off the sidewalk, put the candy near the door...and missed my grandchildren. This is the first year since their birth that I wasn't included in their Halloween "celebration". Sometimes, I just cry.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
The Week
How did it get to be Wednesday already??
Monday, I took the day off. By that I mean that I didn't do much of anything. I did go to cardiac rehab. For some reason, my blood pressure was low and the exercise seemed easy. I wasn't even winded when I was done. Then I came home to loaf for the rest of the day.
Yesterday, I had an appointment with a dermatologist to remove a growth on my back. It had been growing there awhile but was getting irritated because it was right on my waistline. Then I mentioned a little papiloma-thingie that was on the lash line of my lower right eyelid. The doc said he'd take care of both of them right then! The worst part of all of that are the shots that they give to numb the area. Having a shot in the lower eyelid isn't a lot of fun! Anyway, I came home less than an hour later with a little black scab on my eyelid and a bandage on my back. If the growth on my back comes back as malignant, I'll have to go back for more digging. Otherwise, I'm done until the next thing pops up.
Today (Wednesday) I puttered around the house some, then went to rehab again, but this time, my legs felt rubbery, BP was a little higher, and the exercise seemed more difficult. Wish I could explain why each time is different...
It is supposed to be warm tomorrow. I'm going to try to get some yard work done and get ready for a trip to Chicago on Friday morning for a SATERN handbook revision meeting. Should be back on Saturday in time for Trick-or-Treaters. This will be the first time in seven years that I won't get to see my grandchildren on Halloween. :( Hope Nathan and Kendra take pictures and are willing to share...
Monday, I took the day off. By that I mean that I didn't do much of anything. I did go to cardiac rehab. For some reason, my blood pressure was low and the exercise seemed easy. I wasn't even winded when I was done. Then I came home to loaf for the rest of the day.
Yesterday, I had an appointment with a dermatologist to remove a growth on my back. It had been growing there awhile but was getting irritated because it was right on my waistline. Then I mentioned a little papiloma-thingie that was on the lash line of my lower right eyelid. The doc said he'd take care of both of them right then! The worst part of all of that are the shots that they give to numb the area. Having a shot in the lower eyelid isn't a lot of fun! Anyway, I came home less than an hour later with a little black scab on my eyelid and a bandage on my back. If the growth on my back comes back as malignant, I'll have to go back for more digging. Otherwise, I'm done until the next thing pops up.
Today (Wednesday) I puttered around the house some, then went to rehab again, but this time, my legs felt rubbery, BP was a little higher, and the exercise seemed more difficult. Wish I could explain why each time is different...
It is supposed to be warm tomorrow. I'm going to try to get some yard work done and get ready for a trip to Chicago on Friday morning for a SATERN handbook revision meeting. Should be back on Saturday in time for Trick-or-Treaters. This will be the first time in seven years that I won't get to see my grandchildren on Halloween. :( Hope Nathan and Kendra take pictures and are willing to share...
Monday, October 26, 2009
Sad Day
Two souls have passed today. Major Pat called me this morning to announce that his brother-in-law died sometime this morning...before 7:00. His son found him in total cardiac arrest. He had Lou Gehrig's Disease and was not expected to live. Sad.
Then, suddenly, on Facebook, there was the announcement that Rich Dimmack has passed. Rich was the 7th grade English teacher. I was the 8th grade teacher. We were a team.
Rich was probably 37 or 38...never smoked, never drank...but came up with cancer of the liver. He was married to the very upbeat French teacher at Monrovia High School. They are/were a splendid couple...have 5-year-old twins and a maybe two-year-old infant. May God bless his soul and give strength to his wife and children...and his former students.
I'm tired of the fight. Guess I need to go to bed because nothing seems worth it anymore.
Then, suddenly, on Facebook, there was the announcement that Rich Dimmack has passed. Rich was the 7th grade English teacher. I was the 8th grade teacher. We were a team.
Rich was probably 37 or 38...never smoked, never drank...but came up with cancer of the liver. He was married to the very upbeat French teacher at Monrovia High School. They are/were a splendid couple...have 5-year-old twins and a maybe two-year-old infant. May God bless his soul and give strength to his wife and children...and his former students.
I'm tired of the fight. Guess I need to go to bed because nothing seems worth it anymore.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Repeat
I'm going to repeat a little (most?) of what I wrote last night, just for a complete record of the weekend. If you are reading this, I'm not senile! The children were here this weekend. This is how it went:
Well...where to start?
Nathan and Kendra had the children here at 10:30 Saturday morning. Meg was supposed to show at 11:00. At about 11:10, I received an email from her saying that she was running late and would be here by noon. The children were all excited. Ryan insisted that we set the timer for noon, then watched the timer like a hawk. He would go to the door and yell at Robin, "Nine more minutes!" "Three more minutes!" "As soon as the timer beeps, grab your shoes and your coat and run out the door to meet Mommy!" Well...Mommy didn't show up right at noon. It was more like 12:15...and the children were outside waiting impatiently. When the car finally did roll in, they practically mobbed it.
I had fixed what my school lunch program called a "walking taco". That is all the taco fixings, but put on Frito-like corn chips instead of a tortilla or taco shell. The kids love it and most of it can be made ahead of time. We all sat down to eat. I also had a corned beef in the crock pot for supper--Robin's favorite.
After lunch, Meg decided to take Ryan to Cookie Cutters for a haircut. Robin and I went to Walmart to return some shoes that I had purchased for her that she said hurt her feet. (We also got some acrylic paint for a treasure box project. More on that later.) The plan was to meet up later when we all returned so that we could swap kids so Megan and Robin could go winter coat shopping (for Robbie). While we were in Walmart, Megan called to ask me to buy Benadryl for Ryan because Kendra had suggested giving him some. Something about Ryan's tongue being swollen. Huh? (What I didn't know then, but know now, was that Megan had noticed the swollen tongue while out with Ryan and called Nathan, who was apparently still in town. They met at Stone Cold Creamery to discuss it.) Obviously, Robin and I beat the other two home.
When Megan and Ryan DID get home, I got to see his tongue. It was the underside of his tongue that was swollen...just one side. It looked like a huge, fluid-filled blister. I thought Meg should take him to Immediate Care because I had never seen anything like that before and didn't know if it was dangerous or what. It was then that she announced that she would have to leave by 5:00 to take an online test. I hadn't been told. It was 3:00 when she told me. They left for the IC place right down the road from us.
Years ago, I had purchased a little treasure box, of sorts, to keep my make-up in. It was made of clear plastic with different sized-and-colored polka dots painted on the inside surfaces. I had lined all sides on the inside with white paper so no one could see my mess of beauty implements. I have since moved on to another container for my "face," but I thought Robin might like to have the box. I suggested that she could remove the white paper and paint the inside of the box. Interestingly, she began to muse on what color paint she should use, based on the colors of the polka dots. (I was impressed. I'm not sure I would have given that a thought at her age. I would have just picked a color and then realized my mistake later!) She said she thought "amber" would be good. I said, "Amber is like a gold color." She disappeared into her bedroom and brought out a little wooden chair and said, "I mean THIS color." It was lavendar. Thus, we returned from Wally-World with a small container of lavendar paint. So, while we waited for Ryan and Mommy to return from the doctor, Robin proceeded to paint the inside of the box...and it turned out wonderfully!! I kept complimenting her on her choice of colors. ALL of the polka dots showed up, and she had done a nice job.
Megan called from IC to say, "This could take awhile. There is a line. Should I wait or just leave. What are your thoughts?" Hey...I'm not in control here! I did tell her, however, that if she had to wait too long, Robin was going to be aced out of her "personal" time with Mommy. It was already approaching 3:30. The decision was made that I would take Robin to her at the IC place, and I'd stay with Ryan, waiting to be seen. It took awhile. Ryan was getting impatient, even though there were some things in the waiting area for him to do. (He beat me several times in a memory game on the wall...largely because he had already played it with Mommy. Probably several times. He's a skunk!
The children had both been to the doctor on Friday for check-ups and had received shots (that they shouldn't have needed). Ryan was nervous. The doc came in and determined that what Ryan has is a ranula--a fluid-filled cyst caused by an injured salivary gland. He recommended a tea bag compress several times a day, but should be followed up by an ENT doc or a pediatric dentist if it is still there by Tuesday. Apparently it is a painless thing. Ryan never complained. Don't know the consequences if it isn't treated...
Robin and Megan returned with a new winter coat for Robin. Megan sat for a bit, then left with regret that she couldn't stay to help carve pumpkins. Both kids painted things. The children and I ate our corned beef dinner, then determined that it was time to carve. Did you know that there are differences in pumpkins??? The cute little ones that I had bought were labeled "pie pumpkins". Yeah...so? The "so" part is that you can't carve a pie pumpkin! They are solid. I realized I was licked very early in the game. Worked very hard to get my sharpest knife in the silly thing, and "that's all she wrote". Defeated, I dragged out the paints AGAIN and let the kids paint their pumpkins. I was wearing down by then. The children still had energy. It was about 8:00 PM.
The kids put their jammies on. We watched a couple of videos and ate some popcorn. I put down the chair-futon for Robin who decided she wanted to sleep there. Ryan, after some coaxing that he had the "coolest bed in the house" decided to stay in his own room. By now it was after 10:00 and I was pooped. Robin kept asking me how soon I thought I would go to sleep, which is a warning sign that something might be afoot. I laid awake in my bed for awhile, muting the TV every time I heard a noise. I would go out to check on things, but nothing was out of order (except that Robin was still awake each time I went out). Eventually, I dropped off. Robin awakened me at 12:15 with a hygiene complaint. Took care of that. She woke me again at 2:15 AM with another complaint. I asked if she was still awake because she wasn't comfortable on the futon. She thought so. I told her she could choose her own bed or to sleep with me. Guess which she chose? She conked right out. End of story.
This morning, we were to meet the Heffelman grandparents at early church (8:30). It was plenty tough to get Robin out of bed! We were there in time. The children were good as gold during the service. At one point, there is a children's message where the attending children are called to the front for a little lesson before being sent off to kid activities. This morning, there were only three children: Robin, Ryan, and another young gentleman who was helping his father as an usher. The message was about a compass that always points north, and that the Bible always points to God. Robin raised her hand and volunteered to the minister in front of the whole congregation that she was attending Catholic school...and Ryan mentioned the rosary. The minister, unflapped, welcomed them as visitors. Ugh! They went on to supervised "children's church" while we finished the service. Granpa Phil, making the best of the situation, said he thought it was great that his grandchildren could "volunteer" to speak in front of the faithful. Let's see...the children have been "raised" in the Unitarian Universalist Church, are attending St. Mary's Catholic School in Muncie, and did pre-school plus additional attendance at Plainfield United Methodist Church. Do you think they'll be confused???
I left it up to the children if they wanted to attend Sunday School after the service. Both did. The Heffelman grandparents and I took them to their locations. They had friends in attendance and were happy as little clams when we left. (One of the mothers of Ryan's previous Kdg. class inquired why Ryan wasn't in Brandon's class anymore. We gave a partial and tearful answer. It just happens.) Judy and Phil volunteered to bring the kids home. I had suggested that we all meet for lunch thereafter, but since only Judy stays for Sunday School (and Phil hadn't been assessed of a possible new routine) we let it pass. Maybe next time. As the children were saying "bye" to their Heffelman grandparents in front of the house, Robin clung to Grandpa. I don't know what she is thinking, and it breaks my heart!
When we got home, the children changed back into their Muncie clothes. I had washed them overnight... We had leftovers for lunch. Ryan wanted the walking taco. Robin wanted corned beef. Then they waited for Jack.
Jack is the neighbor boy. He has been a huge influence on the children over many months (mostly Ryan). This weekend, Jack was camping with his cousin. Today, he was due back at noon, then at 1:00. He finally arrived sometime around 1:45, which gave the children short of two hours to play with him before we were scheduled to leave for Muncie. Since it was a nice day, they played outside, throwing leaves on each other, etc. It was all that Ryan needed. He had been so anxious about his friend's absence!
I gathered the children up and left for Muncie at 3:30. We had to stop at the Heffelman grandparents to pick up some sticker books (that actually saved the day in the car)...then got gas. The kids picked on each other most of the way to Muncie. They were both so tired...they even LOOKED tired.
When we got there, Robin headed for the house. Ryan said he was NEVER getting out of the car. (He did.) Apparently Robin said something that got her in trouble with her stepmother before I even got in the house. All I heard was Robin saying, "Guess it's not a good idea, Kendra." She was told not to be so "snotty"....and later told to "lose the attitude" when Wednesday (her daughter) was trying to be in control of delivering Halloween cards to the children. Robin was quite clingy at my departure. I worry about her. She isn't as expressive of her emotions as Ryan...and he has a warped perception of things. She is a sneaky one.
For what it's worth, I delivered my grandchildren to a home similar to mine. Kendra was doing laundry. The house was no less messy than here. No less stress. Just a LITTLE more space. I only cried from their house to I-69 on the way home. I guess that's progress.
Moving on...
Well...where to start?
Nathan and Kendra had the children here at 10:30 Saturday morning. Meg was supposed to show at 11:00. At about 11:10, I received an email from her saying that she was running late and would be here by noon. The children were all excited. Ryan insisted that we set the timer for noon, then watched the timer like a hawk. He would go to the door and yell at Robin, "Nine more minutes!" "Three more minutes!" "As soon as the timer beeps, grab your shoes and your coat and run out the door to meet Mommy!" Well...Mommy didn't show up right at noon. It was more like 12:15...and the children were outside waiting impatiently. When the car finally did roll in, they practically mobbed it.
I had fixed what my school lunch program called a "walking taco". That is all the taco fixings, but put on Frito-like corn chips instead of a tortilla or taco shell. The kids love it and most of it can be made ahead of time. We all sat down to eat. I also had a corned beef in the crock pot for supper--Robin's favorite.
After lunch, Meg decided to take Ryan to Cookie Cutters for a haircut. Robin and I went to Walmart to return some shoes that I had purchased for her that she said hurt her feet. (We also got some acrylic paint for a treasure box project. More on that later.) The plan was to meet up later when we all returned so that we could swap kids so Megan and Robin could go winter coat shopping (for Robbie). While we were in Walmart, Megan called to ask me to buy Benadryl for Ryan because Kendra had suggested giving him some. Something about Ryan's tongue being swollen. Huh? (What I didn't know then, but know now, was that Megan had noticed the swollen tongue while out with Ryan and called Nathan, who was apparently still in town. They met at Stone Cold Creamery to discuss it.) Obviously, Robin and I beat the other two home.
When Megan and Ryan DID get home, I got to see his tongue. It was the underside of his tongue that was swollen...just one side. It looked like a huge, fluid-filled blister. I thought Meg should take him to Immediate Care because I had never seen anything like that before and didn't know if it was dangerous or what. It was then that she announced that she would have to leave by 5:00 to take an online test. I hadn't been told. It was 3:00 when she told me. They left for the IC place right down the road from us.
Years ago, I had purchased a little treasure box, of sorts, to keep my make-up in. It was made of clear plastic with different sized-and-colored polka dots painted on the inside surfaces. I had lined all sides on the inside with white paper so no one could see my mess of beauty implements. I have since moved on to another container for my "face," but I thought Robin might like to have the box. I suggested that she could remove the white paper and paint the inside of the box. Interestingly, she began to muse on what color paint she should use, based on the colors of the polka dots. (I was impressed. I'm not sure I would have given that a thought at her age. I would have just picked a color and then realized my mistake later!) She said she thought "amber" would be good. I said, "Amber is like a gold color." She disappeared into her bedroom and brought out a little wooden chair and said, "I mean THIS color." It was lavendar. Thus, we returned from Wally-World with a small container of lavendar paint. So, while we waited for Ryan and Mommy to return from the doctor, Robin proceeded to paint the inside of the box...and it turned out wonderfully!! I kept complimenting her on her choice of colors. ALL of the polka dots showed up, and she had done a nice job.
Megan called from IC to say, "This could take awhile. There is a line. Should I wait or just leave. What are your thoughts?" Hey...I'm not in control here! I did tell her, however, that if she had to wait too long, Robin was going to be aced out of her "personal" time with Mommy. It was already approaching 3:30. The decision was made that I would take Robin to her at the IC place, and I'd stay with Ryan, waiting to be seen. It took awhile. Ryan was getting impatient, even though there were some things in the waiting area for him to do. (He beat me several times in a memory game on the wall...largely because he had already played it with Mommy. Probably several times. He's a skunk!
The children had both been to the doctor on Friday for check-ups and had received shots (that they shouldn't have needed). Ryan was nervous. The doc came in and determined that what Ryan has is a ranula--a fluid-filled cyst caused by an injured salivary gland. He recommended a tea bag compress several times a day, but should be followed up by an ENT doc or a pediatric dentist if it is still there by Tuesday. Apparently it is a painless thing. Ryan never complained. Don't know the consequences if it isn't treated...
Robin and Megan returned with a new winter coat for Robin. Megan sat for a bit, then left with regret that she couldn't stay to help carve pumpkins. Both kids painted things. The children and I ate our corned beef dinner, then determined that it was time to carve. Did you know that there are differences in pumpkins??? The cute little ones that I had bought were labeled "pie pumpkins". Yeah...so? The "so" part is that you can't carve a pie pumpkin! They are solid. I realized I was licked very early in the game. Worked very hard to get my sharpest knife in the silly thing, and "that's all she wrote". Defeated, I dragged out the paints AGAIN and let the kids paint their pumpkins. I was wearing down by then. The children still had energy. It was about 8:00 PM.
The kids put their jammies on. We watched a couple of videos and ate some popcorn. I put down the chair-futon for Robin who decided she wanted to sleep there. Ryan, after some coaxing that he had the "coolest bed in the house" decided to stay in his own room. By now it was after 10:00 and I was pooped. Robin kept asking me how soon I thought I would go to sleep, which is a warning sign that something might be afoot. I laid awake in my bed for awhile, muting the TV every time I heard a noise. I would go out to check on things, but nothing was out of order (except that Robin was still awake each time I went out). Eventually, I dropped off. Robin awakened me at 12:15 with a hygiene complaint. Took care of that. She woke me again at 2:15 AM with another complaint. I asked if she was still awake because she wasn't comfortable on the futon. She thought so. I told her she could choose her own bed or to sleep with me. Guess which she chose? She conked right out. End of story.
This morning, we were to meet the Heffelman grandparents at early church (8:30). It was plenty tough to get Robin out of bed! We were there in time. The children were good as gold during the service. At one point, there is a children's message where the attending children are called to the front for a little lesson before being sent off to kid activities. This morning, there were only three children: Robin, Ryan, and another young gentleman who was helping his father as an usher. The message was about a compass that always points north, and that the Bible always points to God. Robin raised her hand and volunteered to the minister in front of the whole congregation that she was attending Catholic school...and Ryan mentioned the rosary. The minister, unflapped, welcomed them as visitors. Ugh! They went on to supervised "children's church" while we finished the service. Granpa Phil, making the best of the situation, said he thought it was great that his grandchildren could "volunteer" to speak in front of the faithful. Let's see...the children have been "raised" in the Unitarian Universalist Church, are attending St. Mary's Catholic School in Muncie, and did pre-school plus additional attendance at Plainfield United Methodist Church. Do you think they'll be confused???
I left it up to the children if they wanted to attend Sunday School after the service. Both did. The Heffelman grandparents and I took them to their locations. They had friends in attendance and were happy as little clams when we left. (One of the mothers of Ryan's previous Kdg. class inquired why Ryan wasn't in Brandon's class anymore. We gave a partial and tearful answer. It just happens.) Judy and Phil volunteered to bring the kids home. I had suggested that we all meet for lunch thereafter, but since only Judy stays for Sunday School (and Phil hadn't been assessed of a possible new routine) we let it pass. Maybe next time. As the children were saying "bye" to their Heffelman grandparents in front of the house, Robin clung to Grandpa. I don't know what she is thinking, and it breaks my heart!
When we got home, the children changed back into their Muncie clothes. I had washed them overnight... We had leftovers for lunch. Ryan wanted the walking taco. Robin wanted corned beef. Then they waited for Jack.
Jack is the neighbor boy. He has been a huge influence on the children over many months (mostly Ryan). This weekend, Jack was camping with his cousin. Today, he was due back at noon, then at 1:00. He finally arrived sometime around 1:45, which gave the children short of two hours to play with him before we were scheduled to leave for Muncie. Since it was a nice day, they played outside, throwing leaves on each other, etc. It was all that Ryan needed. He had been so anxious about his friend's absence!
I gathered the children up and left for Muncie at 3:30. We had to stop at the Heffelman grandparents to pick up some sticker books (that actually saved the day in the car)...then got gas. The kids picked on each other most of the way to Muncie. They were both so tired...they even LOOKED tired.
When we got there, Robin headed for the house. Ryan said he was NEVER getting out of the car. (He did.) Apparently Robin said something that got her in trouble with her stepmother before I even got in the house. All I heard was Robin saying, "Guess it's not a good idea, Kendra." She was told not to be so "snotty"....and later told to "lose the attitude" when Wednesday (her daughter) was trying to be in control of delivering Halloween cards to the children. Robin was quite clingy at my departure. I worry about her. She isn't as expressive of her emotions as Ryan...and he has a warped perception of things. She is a sneaky one.
For what it's worth, I delivered my grandchildren to a home similar to mine. Kendra was doing laundry. The house was no less messy than here. No less stress. Just a LITTLE more space. I only cried from their house to I-69 on the way home. I guess that's progress.
Moving on...
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Kids
Nathan delivered the children to my house this morning about 10:30. Meg was supposed to come at 11:00, so the kids were in eager anticipation...but then I got an email that she would be here at noon. Ryan insisted that I set the timer so he would know when noon would be. He watched the timer like a hawk...and when it went off, he and his sister were out the door waiting for Mommy to arrive. She was 15 minutes late...but oh my gosh! They were SO excited, the anticipation was causing them to act up outside.
After a "walking taco" lunch, Meg took Ryan to get his hair cut while Robin and I took back a pair of shoes that I had purchased for her but she said hurt her feet. While Robin and I were out, we also picked up some paint for a little craft project--painting a little box that I had given her to put treasures in. Meg called in the meantime to ask me to pick up some Benadryl because Ryan had a swollen tongue. Huh?? Sure enough, the under side of his tongue on one side looks like a huge blister full of fluid. Meg took him to the Immediate Care place down the street from here, but there was a line. She was going to take Robin out to look for a winter coat after she got back with Ryan. Robin and I went to the Immediate Care place to trade places. I waited with Ryan for the doctor while Robin and Meg went coat shopping. Thereafter, Meg left to go back to Terre Haute to take an online test.
I had fixed a corned beef dinner (Robin's favorite), so the children and I ate well. We were going to carve pumpkins after din-din. Au contraire! I could NOT get a knife into either pumpkin. Never had a pumpkin I couldn't carve! We broke out the paints again and painted the stupid pumpkins!
We watched a little TV, ate a little popcorn, had some homemade ice cream sundaes, and watched a little more TV. Then bed. Everyone is down, but no one is asleep. We are going to early church tomorrow. Hope they conk out soon! I know I'm ready...
After a "walking taco" lunch, Meg took Ryan to get his hair cut while Robin and I took back a pair of shoes that I had purchased for her but she said hurt her feet. While Robin and I were out, we also picked up some paint for a little craft project--painting a little box that I had given her to put treasures in. Meg called in the meantime to ask me to pick up some Benadryl because Ryan had a swollen tongue. Huh?? Sure enough, the under side of his tongue on one side looks like a huge blister full of fluid. Meg took him to the Immediate Care place down the street from here, but there was a line. She was going to take Robin out to look for a winter coat after she got back with Ryan. Robin and I went to the Immediate Care place to trade places. I waited with Ryan for the doctor while Robin and Meg went coat shopping. Thereafter, Meg left to go back to Terre Haute to take an online test.
I had fixed a corned beef dinner (Robin's favorite), so the children and I ate well. We were going to carve pumpkins after din-din. Au contraire! I could NOT get a knife into either pumpkin. Never had a pumpkin I couldn't carve! We broke out the paints again and painted the stupid pumpkins!
We watched a little TV, ate a little popcorn, had some homemade ice cream sundaes, and watched a little more TV. Then bed. Everyone is down, but no one is asleep. We are going to early church tomorrow. Hope they conk out soon! I know I'm ready...
Friday, October 23, 2009
I Did It to Myself
Spent the morning driving my blind ham friend and his teenage helper to his job site at the rest areas near Plainfield. When I got home, I had major grocery shopping to do. (Haven't had much in the house for weeks...and since the grandchildren are coming this weekend, I needed to get some things.) I spent $65 at Aldi's. Got a lot there, but can never get everything I want...so the next trip was to Walmart. (Meijer is probably cheaper but farther away.) Over $100 later, I came home. Had to buy some things for the children to wear while here, etc. Thus, the laundry isn't done; the house isn't dusted or vacuumed; but we will eat!
The power blinked out during the night. I only knew it because I woke up when the 2-meter radio beeped back on. Thankfully, only the microwave now blinks after a power failure.
My Internet isn't working well at all. Don't know what the problem is. It seems to be weather-related. I've rebooted everything that I can reboot. Maybe tomorrow will be better. For today, it is frustrating!
The power blinked out during the night. I only knew it because I woke up when the 2-meter radio beeped back on. Thankfully, only the microwave now blinks after a power failure.
My Internet isn't working well at all. Don't know what the problem is. It seems to be weather-related. I've rebooted everything that I can reboot. Maybe tomorrow will be better. For today, it is frustrating!
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Peggy's Taxi Service
Perhaps I am being too sensitive because I have had a lot of "hits" lately for driving people around, but in the last few days, I've felt like I have a target painted on my rear.
Yesterday, I spent no fewer than five hours driving two ham radio friends to different locations. One is blind and (obviously) can't drive. He needed to go to his bank. The other had a borrowed car and needed an additional driver to help him pick up his "new" car and return the loaner to a community far to the west. Both fellows are good friends and would do the same for me.
I provided a ride for the blind friend to a luncheon gathering for my radio club folks today, and a ride to Danville, IN, for another ham friend (whose car is broken down) to get RACES (Radio Amateur Civil Emergency Services) credentials, since I was going that way. Tomorrow morning, I will take the blind friend to his workplace for several hours to get his tasks done...then the yellow taxi sign on top of my vehicle goes into the Oscar-Foxtrot-Foxtrot position! Amateur radio operators take care of one another. I am usually on the receiving end of their good will. I try to give back by paying them or offering to help however I can. Right now, I'm just DONE for awhile.
Looks like I will get to see my grandchildren for slightly more than 24 hours this weekend. Since the weather will turn off crappy, Megan will be here to "hang out" with them on Saturday. We are still feeling our way through new circumstances. I hate my new status as part-time grandmother, but I'll take whatever I can get, at this point. My guess is that my daughter will move to California at the end of the year. Don't know how she will see her children after that. I just don't want to lose them to the confusion!
The patio project is on hold until after the rain is over....when?? Who knows? There are still a bunch of things to do in the house, but there's no hurry. No one is ever here!
Oh...for those of you who worry...I called the dermatologist's office today to tell them that I am on "blood thinners" and to make sure that it wouldn't have an effect on the growth removal scheduled for Tuesday. The nurse assured me that the docs there do not take patients off their meds. They just control the bleeding. What is being removed is about the size of a pencil eraser. I seriously doubt I would bleed to death from that!! (Thank you sister Shari and friend Mike for offers to come hold my hand, but the doctor's office is only a half-mile down the road...and I think I can handle this!) I love you all!
Yesterday, I spent no fewer than five hours driving two ham radio friends to different locations. One is blind and (obviously) can't drive. He needed to go to his bank. The other had a borrowed car and needed an additional driver to help him pick up his "new" car and return the loaner to a community far to the west. Both fellows are good friends and would do the same for me.
I provided a ride for the blind friend to a luncheon gathering for my radio club folks today, and a ride to Danville, IN, for another ham friend (whose car is broken down) to get RACES (Radio Amateur Civil Emergency Services) credentials, since I was going that way. Tomorrow morning, I will take the blind friend to his workplace for several hours to get his tasks done...then the yellow taxi sign on top of my vehicle goes into the Oscar-Foxtrot-Foxtrot position! Amateur radio operators take care of one another. I am usually on the receiving end of their good will. I try to give back by paying them or offering to help however I can. Right now, I'm just DONE for awhile.
Looks like I will get to see my grandchildren for slightly more than 24 hours this weekend. Since the weather will turn off crappy, Megan will be here to "hang out" with them on Saturday. We are still feeling our way through new circumstances. I hate my new status as part-time grandmother, but I'll take whatever I can get, at this point. My guess is that my daughter will move to California at the end of the year. Don't know how she will see her children after that. I just don't want to lose them to the confusion!
The patio project is on hold until after the rain is over....when?? Who knows? There are still a bunch of things to do in the house, but there's no hurry. No one is ever here!
Oh...for those of you who worry...I called the dermatologist's office today to tell them that I am on "blood thinners" and to make sure that it wouldn't have an effect on the growth removal scheduled for Tuesday. The nurse assured me that the docs there do not take patients off their meds. They just control the bleeding. What is being removed is about the size of a pencil eraser. I seriously doubt I would bleed to death from that!! (Thank you sister Shari and friend Mike for offers to come hold my hand, but the doctor's office is only a half-mile down the road...and I think I can handle this!) I love you all!
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Patio
Since the weather was lovely today, I decided to work outside. (I should have started a whole lot earlier than I did, but stuff happens!) For the last 1 1/2 years, the patio has been piled high with stuff that used to be in the garage, which is now my bedroom. I have gone out there a number of times to work but usually just throw up my hands and give up because there is SO much to do. Much of what has been put out there has been damaged by the weather over the years. I got a garbage can and just started pitching things.
One thing I didn't pitch was Megan's hand mixer, still in its original plastic case. Since I knew she would be in the neighborhood today (because the doctor's office called here to remind her of her appointment) I called to ask if she still wanted it. She did. Said she would come by after her appointment. She did. We talked just a little...about the weekend. I asked to have the children this weekend. Apparently she wants them on Saturday, but has no place to take them. Now she learns what it is like to be "Aunt Mommy". In any case, her phone number will be changing soon. I have no clue what her future plans are. I don't dare ask anything for fear of alienating her further...but I am somewhat tired of walking on eggshells around her. Just for now, I'm okay. I still cry and hurt daily, but I can't fix anything. The holidays approach. I worry about that a lot.
Meg went "home" with some Diet Pepsi's, her winter coat, her hand mixer, some insulated sports bags, and a sweater (of sorts). I guess I am just supposed to pitch the rest. No word on that.
Life goes on.
One thing I didn't pitch was Megan's hand mixer, still in its original plastic case. Since I knew she would be in the neighborhood today (because the doctor's office called here to remind her of her appointment) I called to ask if she still wanted it. She did. Said she would come by after her appointment. She did. We talked just a little...about the weekend. I asked to have the children this weekend. Apparently she wants them on Saturday, but has no place to take them. Now she learns what it is like to be "Aunt Mommy". In any case, her phone number will be changing soon. I have no clue what her future plans are. I don't dare ask anything for fear of alienating her further...but I am somewhat tired of walking on eggshells around her. Just for now, I'm okay. I still cry and hurt daily, but I can't fix anything. The holidays approach. I worry about that a lot.
Meg went "home" with some Diet Pepsi's, her winter coat, her hand mixer, some insulated sports bags, and a sweater (of sorts). I guess I am just supposed to pitch the rest. No word on that.
Life goes on.
Monday, October 19, 2009
STILL another day...
Went to cardiac rehab today and reported the hyper-heartbeat of Friday. No one could account for it without a monitor. So...I have cut caffeine out of my life. Also, I find that over-eating contributes to a rapid heart rate. Don't know why.
My appointment for "growth" removal is next Tuesday. The gals at rehab tell me that I need to inform the dermatologist's office that I am on blood thinners. I can't imagine that I will bleed to death from a simple excision, but who knows how simple it will be? Okay...so I'll call them tomorrow in case I have to talk to the cardiologist about medications. Things get complicated, ya know?
There was sunshine today and some warmer temps...but wind. If I can get a day or two of decent temperatures, I will work on getting the patio cleaned up. The inside of the house can wait. No one is here to see it...
I still have so many unanswered questions and so much hurt. Every day, I ask God for the wisdom to get by. Some days are better than others. Were I energized by family motivation, I would have moved mountains by now. As it is, I just survive. I am beginning to understand the dynamic of what has happened in my life, although I can't accept it. I don't have much other choice!
The holidays approach. With so many questions, I'm not sure what to expect. Life goes on, dear friends, whether I want it to or not!
Ciao.
My appointment for "growth" removal is next Tuesday. The gals at rehab tell me that I need to inform the dermatologist's office that I am on blood thinners. I can't imagine that I will bleed to death from a simple excision, but who knows how simple it will be? Okay...so I'll call them tomorrow in case I have to talk to the cardiologist about medications. Things get complicated, ya know?
There was sunshine today and some warmer temps...but wind. If I can get a day or two of decent temperatures, I will work on getting the patio cleaned up. The inside of the house can wait. No one is here to see it...
I still have so many unanswered questions and so much hurt. Every day, I ask God for the wisdom to get by. Some days are better than others. Were I energized by family motivation, I would have moved mountains by now. As it is, I just survive. I am beginning to understand the dynamic of what has happened in my life, although I can't accept it. I don't have much other choice!
The holidays approach. With so many questions, I'm not sure what to expect. Life goes on, dear friends, whether I want it to or not!
Ciao.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Another day
Grandma Judy called me this afternoon with a wedding report. It seems that all went well.
I have asked Kendra for the children for next weekend but have heard nothing, yet. Guess they have been just a bit busy in Muncie!
Got my retirement paperwork turned in yesterday. Once it kicks in, I won't starve. Things could be interesting in the meantime.
I am still dealing with my reality, whatever that is. Thank you to my friends who are forever vigilant. I am doing the best I can.
I have asked Kendra for the children for next weekend but have heard nothing, yet. Guess they have been just a bit busy in Muncie!
Got my retirement paperwork turned in yesterday. Once it kicks in, I won't starve. Things could be interesting in the meantime.
I am still dealing with my reality, whatever that is. Thank you to my friends who are forever vigilant. I am doing the best I can.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Hmmm...
Wrote a whole big long blog post the other day...but it doesn't seem to be here. How did that happen?? Can't even remember what I said.
Took a nap late this afternoon. Woke up in my clothes and thought it was morning. I hate when that happens. It wasn't even dark yet!
Got some retirement paperwork turned in today. The good news is that I will get my pension benefits retroactive to when I retired. The bad news is that I probably won't get it until December 1st. At least I'll get it! Thanks to friend Ryan for driving me downtown. I don't like driving down there by myself. It cost a whopping $9 to park...and we could only have been in the office for just slightly over an hour!
Today was Wedding Day for my former son-in-law. He and his bride (Nathan and Kendra) have been together for at least two years. Since they now have custody of the grandchildren, I'm glad they took this step. Grandma Judy promised to take lots of pictures so I could share in the moment. I wish them all the best.
Worked on my room some yesterday. I can't believe the mess I have allowed to pile up. I keep saving things that don't need to be saved. I'll keep working on it. Eventually, I should actually be able to see the floor...and maybe have a real file system for papers that are important instead of things that date back to the 60s and 70s!
Cardiac rehab is going well. I make myself go, some days. I haven't experienced any chest pain or even breathlessness. After rehab yesterday, however, hours after I got home, I was aware that my heart was pounding. Took my pulse. My heart was racing...something like 108 beats a minute...and I wasn't doing anything at all physical. It kind of concerned me. I will report it to the rehab people on Monday. It did finally slow down a bit, but I have to worry about every little thing now. I can't live like that...
Another worry: I have a "thingie" on my back. A mole, of sorts. I can't see it, of course, but it keeps growing and feels like the squamous cell carcinoma that I had on my face six years ago...so I will be making an appointment to have it removed next week. At least THIS scar won't be on my face/head!
Oh! Monrovia High School Bulldogs (football team) and the Bulldog Brigade (band) are undefeated this year, so far! I am so proud of my former students and rejoice in their victories. What a great year for them! I've asked to have the grandchildren next weekend. (Haven't heard yet.) IF the band performs anywhere close by for semi-state, maybe I can take the children to watch. The weather is supposed to be a little better through the week. We'll see!
I only cry once or twice a day now. It appears that I am "collateral damage" in all that has happened, so I figure I have to move on. Have done it before. Will do it again...just all alone, this time. It's confusing, at best.
Thinking ahead to the holidays bothers me, but I can only take one day at at time!
Blessings.
Took a nap late this afternoon. Woke up in my clothes and thought it was morning. I hate when that happens. It wasn't even dark yet!
Got some retirement paperwork turned in today. The good news is that I will get my pension benefits retroactive to when I retired. The bad news is that I probably won't get it until December 1st. At least I'll get it! Thanks to friend Ryan for driving me downtown. I don't like driving down there by myself. It cost a whopping $9 to park...and we could only have been in the office for just slightly over an hour!
Today was Wedding Day for my former son-in-law. He and his bride (Nathan and Kendra) have been together for at least two years. Since they now have custody of the grandchildren, I'm glad they took this step. Grandma Judy promised to take lots of pictures so I could share in the moment. I wish them all the best.
Worked on my room some yesterday. I can't believe the mess I have allowed to pile up. I keep saving things that don't need to be saved. I'll keep working on it. Eventually, I should actually be able to see the floor...and maybe have a real file system for papers that are important instead of things that date back to the 60s and 70s!
Cardiac rehab is going well. I make myself go, some days. I haven't experienced any chest pain or even breathlessness. After rehab yesterday, however, hours after I got home, I was aware that my heart was pounding. Took my pulse. My heart was racing...something like 108 beats a minute...and I wasn't doing anything at all physical. It kind of concerned me. I will report it to the rehab people on Monday. It did finally slow down a bit, but I have to worry about every little thing now. I can't live like that...
Another worry: I have a "thingie" on my back. A mole, of sorts. I can't see it, of course, but it keeps growing and feels like the squamous cell carcinoma that I had on my face six years ago...so I will be making an appointment to have it removed next week. At least THIS scar won't be on my face/head!
Oh! Monrovia High School Bulldogs (football team) and the Bulldog Brigade (band) are undefeated this year, so far! I am so proud of my former students and rejoice in their victories. What a great year for them! I've asked to have the grandchildren next weekend. (Haven't heard yet.) IF the band performs anywhere close by for semi-state, maybe I can take the children to watch. The weather is supposed to be a little better through the week. We'll see!
I only cry once or twice a day now. It appears that I am "collateral damage" in all that has happened, so I figure I have to move on. Have done it before. Will do it again...just all alone, this time. It's confusing, at best.
Thinking ahead to the holidays bothers me, but I can only take one day at at time!
Blessings.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Blah
Haven't felt good all day. Digestive thing. Basically didn't do anything. Never left the house.
So...what HAVE I done? Let's see...I fixed salmon patties. Those were my four food groups for today. I did two loads of laundry, just because it was there. Oh...and I killed a huge spider by the back door. I keep watching a patch of paint that I spilled on the patio concrete while it dries.
I did run the radio net tonight. Talked on the phone about three times.
Life in the slow lane!
So...what HAVE I done? Let's see...I fixed salmon patties. Those were my four food groups for today. I did two loads of laundry, just because it was there. Oh...and I killed a huge spider by the back door. I keep watching a patch of paint that I spilled on the patio concrete while it dries.
I did run the radio net tonight. Talked on the phone about three times.
Life in the slow lane!
Monday, October 12, 2009
It's All About Control, Isn't It!
Two months into my retirement, I had a heart attack. There is no more helpless feeling than lying on your back in an ambulance, feeling your heart doing weird things, but being unable to control any of it. With the brain aneurysm, I was sick as a dog and looking for relief. With the heart attack, I felt helpless. The aneurysm was a once-in-a-lifetime event. The heart attack was life-altering. I walked through the grocery store a few days later realizing that there was nothing left for me to eat. Sodium. Cholesterol. Calories. Stuff. It was depressing. Still is.
A few weeks later, my life changed again. The life that my grandchildren and I had eked out with our new existance (my retirement) was ripped away from me without my understanding or permission. Custody of the children was given to their father, and I was to blame. (It's ever thus.) Once again, I am met with circumstances not in my control. I have worked my entire life to be something to somebody. Now, my own daughter avoids me. Can't control that. Can't control what is ahead in life. Can't control anything. 'Tis a pretty helpless feeling.
Met with my friend Phyllis this evening. She and I shared our mutual fears that if something happens, we have to figure out how to call 911 AND unlock the front door so that rescuers can gain admittance. Pretty scary, but a fact of life now. Dramatic? Yeah...until it happens. I miss my mommy.
A few weeks later, my life changed again. The life that my grandchildren and I had eked out with our new existance (my retirement) was ripped away from me without my understanding or permission. Custody of the children was given to their father, and I was to blame. (It's ever thus.) Once again, I am met with circumstances not in my control. I have worked my entire life to be something to somebody. Now, my own daughter avoids me. Can't control that. Can't control what is ahead in life. Can't control anything. 'Tis a pretty helpless feeling.
Met with my friend Phyllis this evening. She and I shared our mutual fears that if something happens, we have to figure out how to call 911 AND unlock the front door so that rescuers can gain admittance. Pretty scary, but a fact of life now. Dramatic? Yeah...until it happens. I miss my mommy.
Blah
Was awake most of the night due to a late nap last evening. I hate when that happens, but it does.
Today, I spent most of the day waiting for ISTA to call me back. This is the organization that controls my funds for retirement health insurance, etc. I have called four times since last week and have yet to get a human. I'm pretty ticked off about it. It's my money, but I can't get to it...and now they won't return my calls just to answer a simple question. Great!
I went to a friend's house tonight to help me wade through the retirement paperwork that I have avoided. Phyllis is a great gal...very organized and aware (unlike me). She single-handedly got me through my divorce, years ago. She will help me get through the hurt I am enduring now...and the red tape. I love you, Phyllis!
Time for bed. God provides.
Today, I spent most of the day waiting for ISTA to call me back. This is the organization that controls my funds for retirement health insurance, etc. I have called four times since last week and have yet to get a human. I'm pretty ticked off about it. It's my money, but I can't get to it...and now they won't return my calls just to answer a simple question. Great!
I went to a friend's house tonight to help me wade through the retirement paperwork that I have avoided. Phyllis is a great gal...very organized and aware (unlike me). She single-handedly got me through my divorce, years ago. She will help me get through the hurt I am enduring now...and the red tape. I love you, Phyllis!
Time for bed. God provides.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
*Poke*
I've been gigged for not updating my blog regularly. Guess I haven't. Not all that much to report!
The weather has turned cold. Last year, it was November before it got cold and stayed that way. This year, October? We have been below average in temps and above average in precipitation. Had two days of solid rain last week...enough to make everything cold, wet, and gloomy. We had frost last night but at least the sun is shining today. Looks like the gourd plant survived the frost.
The gourd plant used to be TWO gourd plants that Grandma Judy had started from seed for the grandchildren. For awhile, they were in two foam cups in the bay window. I had to remind myself to water them and make sure that the children wouldn't drown them with water. Then there were four days in the hospital with my heart attack when the children were in Muncie for a week. I was just sure that the plants would be dead when I got home, but they weren't. (Pretty droopy, but not dead.) I transferred them to a pot outside. One eventually died; the other took off and now is spread across the lawn. (I didn't know that gourd plants were vines!) Anyway, in spite of the blossoms, only two gourds have formed. Since I'm not sure how big they should be or what shape, I'm letting them mature--although it's a slow process due to the colder temps. MAYBE there will be a gourd or two before a killing freeze...
Saturday was Tox-Away Day in Hendricks County. The county has these events four times a year in different locations so that residents can safely dispose of toxic wastes (including pharmaceuticals, which I didn't know about). The last time that I took part in one of those, quite a few years ago, there was a dumpster on the lot of the road maintenance facility. Just had to throw the paint cans over the side and move on. Not anymore! The location this time was at the local middle school. I went down there with ancient pesticides and pesticide containers in the trunk. There was a "gerbil" tube of cones to go through, and several stations to report to...and a line of cars/trucks. Big deal! Didn't even have to get out of the vehicle. The volunteers did it all. I'm glad I went. I'm too conscientious to just dump toxic stuff, but too lazy/unaware to drive all over the county to get rid of it. Guess they were also taking electronics...and even appliances!
I called the grandchildren yesterday. I'm always a bit hesitant. Nathan and Kendra don't have a house phone...just cell phones...and I'm never sure which one to call--his or hers. Then, too, the children can get windy, using up cell phone minutes. Anyway, Nathan called me back. Got to talk to Robin first. She had gotten her ears pierced yesterday. And I learned that she and Mommy are "pen pals". (Robin decided to tell me what pen pals are, etc.) She talked on and on. When I got to talk to Ryan, he was holding the phone too close to his mouth. I couldn't understand some of what he was saying, but none of it was important. He was merely commenting on things he was looking at...like his fish in their HUGE aquarium, etc. They are all preparing for a wedding next weekend--Daddy and Kendra's.
I went to early church this morning. The walls didn't even fall in! Once upon a time, I went to church every Sunday, all by myself. (In fact, did that from about 2nd grade, on.) Then, in 1993, when my father got sick, I spent a lot of weekends in Illinois. Church attendance fell by the wayside. When Dad died in the early spring of '94, I just never went back. Meg was in high school. I was still in the relatively early throes of making a post-divorce life for us in Plainfield. When Megan got married, I spent my weekends helping her with the grandchildren locally, then was driving to Muncie every whip-stitch when they moved there. Then she and the children moved here. Precious weekend time was spent doing laundry and cleaning. Now, she and the children are gone; I am retired. I have no further excuse for not seeking to improve my spirituality. (Sadly neglected!) It is my plan to continue to reach out to the Community of the Faithful to receive whatever blessings I can get. I am "needy" right now. When that changes, perhaps I can give back.
My life has changed forever. My experience is that it takes two years for me to adjust to major life changes. Three weeks down; 101 to go...
The weather has turned cold. Last year, it was November before it got cold and stayed that way. This year, October? We have been below average in temps and above average in precipitation. Had two days of solid rain last week...enough to make everything cold, wet, and gloomy. We had frost last night but at least the sun is shining today. Looks like the gourd plant survived the frost.
The gourd plant used to be TWO gourd plants that Grandma Judy had started from seed for the grandchildren. For awhile, they were in two foam cups in the bay window. I had to remind myself to water them and make sure that the children wouldn't drown them with water. Then there were four days in the hospital with my heart attack when the children were in Muncie for a week. I was just sure that the plants would be dead when I got home, but they weren't. (Pretty droopy, but not dead.) I transferred them to a pot outside. One eventually died; the other took off and now is spread across the lawn. (I didn't know that gourd plants were vines!) Anyway, in spite of the blossoms, only two gourds have formed. Since I'm not sure how big they should be or what shape, I'm letting them mature--although it's a slow process due to the colder temps. MAYBE there will be a gourd or two before a killing freeze...
Saturday was Tox-Away Day in Hendricks County. The county has these events four times a year in different locations so that residents can safely dispose of toxic wastes (including pharmaceuticals, which I didn't know about). The last time that I took part in one of those, quite a few years ago, there was a dumpster on the lot of the road maintenance facility. Just had to throw the paint cans over the side and move on. Not anymore! The location this time was at the local middle school. I went down there with ancient pesticides and pesticide containers in the trunk. There was a "gerbil" tube of cones to go through, and several stations to report to...and a line of cars/trucks. Big deal! Didn't even have to get out of the vehicle. The volunteers did it all. I'm glad I went. I'm too conscientious to just dump toxic stuff, but too lazy/unaware to drive all over the county to get rid of it. Guess they were also taking electronics...and even appliances!
I called the grandchildren yesterday. I'm always a bit hesitant. Nathan and Kendra don't have a house phone...just cell phones...and I'm never sure which one to call--his or hers. Then, too, the children can get windy, using up cell phone minutes. Anyway, Nathan called me back. Got to talk to Robin first. She had gotten her ears pierced yesterday. And I learned that she and Mommy are "pen pals". (Robin decided to tell me what pen pals are, etc.) She talked on and on. When I got to talk to Ryan, he was holding the phone too close to his mouth. I couldn't understand some of what he was saying, but none of it was important. He was merely commenting on things he was looking at...like his fish in their HUGE aquarium, etc. They are all preparing for a wedding next weekend--Daddy and Kendra's.
I went to early church this morning. The walls didn't even fall in! Once upon a time, I went to church every Sunday, all by myself. (In fact, did that from about 2nd grade, on.) Then, in 1993, when my father got sick, I spent a lot of weekends in Illinois. Church attendance fell by the wayside. When Dad died in the early spring of '94, I just never went back. Meg was in high school. I was still in the relatively early throes of making a post-divorce life for us in Plainfield. When Megan got married, I spent my weekends helping her with the grandchildren locally, then was driving to Muncie every whip-stitch when they moved there. Then she and the children moved here. Precious weekend time was spent doing laundry and cleaning. Now, she and the children are gone; I am retired. I have no further excuse for not seeking to improve my spirituality. (Sadly neglected!) It is my plan to continue to reach out to the Community of the Faithful to receive whatever blessings I can get. I am "needy" right now. When that changes, perhaps I can give back.
My life has changed forever. My experience is that it takes two years for me to adjust to major life changes. Three weeks down; 101 to go...
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Kinda Sick
I've had a digestive upset the last two days. It just makes me feel weak and cold. This afternoon, I finally crawled into bed about 1:00 just to get warm, but it took over an hour before my feet were warm enough to be comfortable. I slept a little.
Other than that, I have done absolutely nothing today but watch television. I did force myself to eat some.
It's been a cold, rainy, windy, gray day. Matches my mood...
Other than that, I have done absolutely nothing today but watch television. I did force myself to eat some.
It's been a cold, rainy, windy, gray day. Matches my mood...
Monday, October 5, 2009
Another Day
Went to cardiac rehab today. Have to force myself to do that. It isn't all that fun but is the only really positive thing I am doing for myself right now. At least it gives me almost an hour of monitored cardiac exercise, three times a week.
Had a good visit with my grandchildren this weekend. They were here for 24 hours. We packed a lot into a short time. Megan was here for the Quaker Day parade part, then left. I dealt with the children's sadness after she departed...answering questions that children should never have to ask...but then we moved on. We went to the Quaker Western Yearly Meeting House grounds for the craft fair. The kids got to jump in the "bouncie" houses. Ryan got to play with his beloved buddy next door--Jack. Robin got to see her Brownie leader and play with Mariah (her daughter) for a bit. They raked in a lot of candy from the QD parade. We went to see the Heffelman grandparents for about an hour. We had Movie Night with popcorn and comfort blankets...in our jammies. Robin likes to watch movies with the chair-futon made into a bed, so we did that. Ryan and I snuggled on the couch. When the movie was over at 9:30, we prepared for bed. The children were obviously tired, as was I. No one complained that it was time to crash!
Robin requested to sleep with me. Ryan requested to sleep on the chair-futon. I made him go to the bathroom before we retired. When he had accomplished that, he announced, "The juice is out!" As we rolled into bed, Robin commented, "Can you believe it's only 10:00 o'clock?" It had been a very busy day. I got what she meant. Everyone went right to Slumberland. Robin and I snuggled to sleep. In spite of all, Ryan managed to slightly wet the chair. Only slightly, thank goodness...
I was up early on Sunday. We were to meet the children's father at 10:00 on the NE side of Indy for a Conner Prairie trip...but before Nathan left on Saturday, he said he didn't care if it was that early. (He was tired, I think.) Since it was so cold over the weekend, I realized that I had spent too much time organizing the children's warm-weather clothing...that they would need cold-weather clothes, like NOW. I hadn't even started on those! I called Nathan to ask for an hour's more time but found out that the CP event was a Girl Scout thing, and Kendra (his fiancee') is the leader. There was no extra time to be had! I threw things into garbage bags and we headed out. Thankfully, we got there ten minutes before the appointed time.
After I got home, I found things that I meant to send. Typical. May require a trip up there to deliver it all. Robin had requested to take Piccadilly to Muncie. Piccadilly is her big, floppy stuffed horse...someone that she always claimed was her teacher. I told her that Piccadilly was hers and that if she wanted Piccadilly to go to Muncie, she could certainly do that. As I stuffed Piccadilly in a garbage bag for the trip, I looked the horse in the face and said, "Be a good teacher." Robin replied, "She's retired." Ha!
While the children were here, their indoctrination into Catholicism was obvious. (They go to Catholic school in Muncie.) Ryan said the "Our Father" before supper here. (The Protestant world calls that the Lord's Prayer.) Then he proceeded with the "Hail Mary". At the Heffelman grandparents', there was discussion about rosaries and crucifixes. (Grandma J. had a cross around her neck.) They had only been at St. Mary's for two weeks! The children have been raised in the Unitarian Universalist Church. Hope they don't get too confused!
And so it goes. I still survive.
Had a good visit with my grandchildren this weekend. They were here for 24 hours. We packed a lot into a short time. Megan was here for the Quaker Day parade part, then left. I dealt with the children's sadness after she departed...answering questions that children should never have to ask...but then we moved on. We went to the Quaker Western Yearly Meeting House grounds for the craft fair. The kids got to jump in the "bouncie" houses. Ryan got to play with his beloved buddy next door--Jack. Robin got to see her Brownie leader and play with Mariah (her daughter) for a bit. They raked in a lot of candy from the QD parade. We went to see the Heffelman grandparents for about an hour. We had Movie Night with popcorn and comfort blankets...in our jammies. Robin likes to watch movies with the chair-futon made into a bed, so we did that. Ryan and I snuggled on the couch. When the movie was over at 9:30, we prepared for bed. The children were obviously tired, as was I. No one complained that it was time to crash!
Robin requested to sleep with me. Ryan requested to sleep on the chair-futon. I made him go to the bathroom before we retired. When he had accomplished that, he announced, "The juice is out!" As we rolled into bed, Robin commented, "Can you believe it's only 10:00 o'clock?" It had been a very busy day. I got what she meant. Everyone went right to Slumberland. Robin and I snuggled to sleep. In spite of all, Ryan managed to slightly wet the chair. Only slightly, thank goodness...
I was up early on Sunday. We were to meet the children's father at 10:00 on the NE side of Indy for a Conner Prairie trip...but before Nathan left on Saturday, he said he didn't care if it was that early. (He was tired, I think.) Since it was so cold over the weekend, I realized that I had spent too much time organizing the children's warm-weather clothing...that they would need cold-weather clothes, like NOW. I hadn't even started on those! I called Nathan to ask for an hour's more time but found out that the CP event was a Girl Scout thing, and Kendra (his fiancee') is the leader. There was no extra time to be had! I threw things into garbage bags and we headed out. Thankfully, we got there ten minutes before the appointed time.
After I got home, I found things that I meant to send. Typical. May require a trip up there to deliver it all. Robin had requested to take Piccadilly to Muncie. Piccadilly is her big, floppy stuffed horse...someone that she always claimed was her teacher. I told her that Piccadilly was hers and that if she wanted Piccadilly to go to Muncie, she could certainly do that. As I stuffed Piccadilly in a garbage bag for the trip, I looked the horse in the face and said, "Be a good teacher." Robin replied, "She's retired." Ha!
While the children were here, their indoctrination into Catholicism was obvious. (They go to Catholic school in Muncie.) Ryan said the "Our Father" before supper here. (The Protestant world calls that the Lord's Prayer.) Then he proceeded with the "Hail Mary". At the Heffelman grandparents', there was discussion about rosaries and crucifixes. (Grandma J. had a cross around her neck.) They had only been at St. Mary's for two weeks! The children have been raised in the Unitarian Universalist Church. Hope they don't get too confused!
And so it goes. I still survive.
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Life Goes On
I turned the heat on in the house this morning. It was 67 in the house. Too cool for me. Heard a robin in the neighborhood. He needs to keep on moving because it's getting too cold for the songbirds.
I spent much of today getting the grandchildren's clothing together for transport to Muncie. Was sorting by gender and season. A much bigger job than I imagined! Hope I can find enough boxes/tubs to send it all. I will keep a couple of days' worth here, in hopes that the children will be allowed to visit again.
Robin's Brownie leader brought Robin's school supplies from her desk, along with a note from Robbie's teacher indicating her sadness that they didn't have a chance to say good-bye. I found the stuff in the door when I got home from rehab yesterday. It breaks my heart.
I am to see the children for 24 hours this weekend, Saturday morning to Sunday morning. We will do Quaker Day celebrations. My only intent is for the children to enjoy the festivities and play with the neighbor boy whom they love. Apparently their mother will join the parade part of the day. I am doing the best I can.
I survive.
I spent much of today getting the grandchildren's clothing together for transport to Muncie. Was sorting by gender and season. A much bigger job than I imagined! Hope I can find enough boxes/tubs to send it all. I will keep a couple of days' worth here, in hopes that the children will be allowed to visit again.
Robin's Brownie leader brought Robin's school supplies from her desk, along with a note from Robbie's teacher indicating her sadness that they didn't have a chance to say good-bye. I found the stuff in the door when I got home from rehab yesterday. It breaks my heart.
I am to see the children for 24 hours this weekend, Saturday morning to Sunday morning. We will do Quaker Day celebrations. My only intent is for the children to enjoy the festivities and play with the neighbor boy whom they love. Apparently their mother will join the parade part of the day. I am doing the best I can.
I survive.
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