I Need to Say This

My life and my daughter's have been intertwined since her birth.  Her father was no help in raising her, and after The Divorce, I threw myself into finishing the job the best way I knew how. 

Amateur radio put me in the company of males who, by the nature of their gender, feel that it is their job to fix things.  Women understand that whining and complaining is only a way to vent.  Men think that whining and complaining is a bid for resolution. 

My daughter and grandchildren arrived on my doorstep in early March for my birthday...and never left.  I didn't know that was going to happen, but I wasn't totally surprised.  A divorce ensued.  We have maintained some semblance of normalcy for the children in cramped space.  Yes, I get frustrated that not enough of us are doing the housework, and yes, I understand that Meg should be out on her own....but guess what?  A huge amount of her pay goes for child care, and there is no way that she can afford separate housing.  The other part of the story is that when they all moved to Muncie, I was--for the first time in 26 years--alone.  I floundered.  I traveled to Muncie two to three weekends a month and buried myself in trying to help out there.  With them here, no matter how wacky the situation is, it feels okay. 

We have a lot to negotiate, but we are doing okay.  Folks looking in from the outside probably think I am being taken advantage of.  True!  But I have accepted most of it.  I am co-parenting my grandchildren, even if I'm not the best parent in the world.  For the most part, I enjoy having my family with me. 

There are those who figure that having my family live here will ace me out of a personal relationship.  To that, I say that I lived alone for sixteen years prior to their arrival with no marriage proposals!   Which came first?  Did I lose relationships because of my daughter, or did my daughter fill the void? 

At this point in time, I think I am destined to spend the rest of my life with my daughter and grandchildren.  If anyone has a better idea, I am open to hear it!