Why Does Life Have to Be So Hard??

I know that life on this earthly plane can be difficult, but why does it all have to fall apart at once?? It can get tough to keep a stiff upper lip, unless one is a master of denial (which I am), but still...

My former stepson has serious cancer. He's only 43. It is cholangiocarcinoma--cancer of the liver bile ducts. Over the past 3-4 weeks, he's been in surgery three times to insert a stent to drain off the toxins before they can even operate on the tumor. The first stent came out. They replaced it. The second one got kinked. They replaced it and added another (this, just today). And this is just the beginning.

Yesterday, I became aware that the toddler child of a couple of former students (married and living in Plainfield not too far from me) has cancer. She just had surgery to remove a kidney yesterday. This is a BABY, for God's sake! Why does this happen??

The toddler child of my daughter's childhood best friend got a spiral fracture of his leg. No one really knows how it happened, but they sought treatment for him...and he is now in a cast from his toes to his hip. Poor little guy!

The father of one of my dear friends is hospitalized, probably in the final days/weeks/months of life. I ache for him.

Another of my good friends is going through financial difficulties that may mean the loss of his house.

Another dear friend is suffering from backlash from decisions that his children and grandchildren have made, and they are trying to make it seem like he's at fault for being unable to rescue them.

Yet another good friend has some health issues that affect his quality of life--problems with his neck, legs, heart, diabetes...you name it.

My nieces don't get along. Aside from that, both are suffering some major health problems for middle-agers...and both also suffer from relationship problems with their children and expanded families.

Every stinkin' day, my sister is dealing with her husband's growing dementia. He has been an excellent provider with such a fine mind, but now they both are suffering--he from knowing that his mind is slipping, and she from trying to deal with it. Feeling sorry for them isn't enough. A lot of people just don't get it. I'm probably one of them, but I keep trying.

I decided long ago that if one lives long enough, one eventually encounters all of the dysfunctions of life. I guess I've lived long enough! As I putter around in my tiny house, trying to make it okay, I wonder why. I just don't want to leave a mess for anyone to clean up after I croak...but 20 years after I do, it isn't an orderly house that people will remember. I have to begin to focus on what is really important beyond spinning my cleaning wheels. I want people to think that I made the world a little better for having been here. I just wish it weren't so darned painful for them or for me to get through the tough times. I want a magic wand to wave to get rid of cancer and the rest of the world's ugliness!

Why does life have to be so hard? I wish I knew!