My Social Faux Pas

I'm usually fairly sensitive to things going on around me.  That is to say, most of the time anyway, you could take me out in public and I wouldn't embarrass you by saying or doing something stupid. Yesterday, however, wasn't that kind of day.  I embarrassed myself!

As part of her birthday present, I took my granddaughter (Robin) to a clothing store where she has wanted to shop to get tee-shirts with band names/logos on them.  The place is called Hot Topic, and Plainfield has one.  I gave her a budget and turned her loose to pick out what she wanted.  A clerk approached us offering assistance if we needed it.  While Robin shopped, the clerk and I had a small-talk conversation.  This is where the problem came in.  I could NOT tell if the clerk was male or female!  S/He was short and stocky, with a colored and coiffed off-center longish hair style that seemed distinctly feminine.  The voice seemed male but had feminine affectations, like a gay male might have.  S/He had no facial hair and no sideburns, sported earrings and a sparkly stud in the side of his/her nose.  No real breasts, broadish shoulders in a Nike tee-shirt.  Daizy Duke shorts--VERY short and tight--so short, in fact, that the pockets hung down below the leg length from the inside.  The shoes were high-top and clunkyish--another female style trend that I've never liked, but that's because I'm old and old-fashioned.  S/He told me that s/he was leaving Hot Topic soon in order to go to cosmetology school. All s/he wants to do is hair...doesn't care about learning about nails, etc...just hair.  Everything within me screamed that this was a guy wanting to look like a gal...a gay guy, perhaps...but I honestly didn't know for sure.  It shouldn't have mattered, one way or the other.  And it didn't until checkout time.

A different clerk worked us at the register, with the other clerk right behind her. When she asked, "Did anyone help you today?" I said, "That gal right there"...and pointed to him/her. Then it hit me what I had just said, so I promptly made it worse by blurting...."Er...guy...er...whatever."  S/He heard. Both clerks heard but, gratefully, ignored my comment, or seemed to.  Not only had I messed up, I had messed up TWICE!  There was no one else in the shop.  No way I could have hidden behind someone or crawled under the counter.  There was no chuckle from the clerks--no comment at all about what I'd said--but there was also no eye contact from them, either.  I was mortified!!!  I didn't apologize for what I'd said because, in doing so, I was going to have to explain my confusion, which would have compounded everyone's embarrassment, including my own.  I paid for the merchandise and out of the store we went.

The first words out of Robin's mouth when we left were, "I have an important question:  was that person in there a guy or a girl?"

I wish I knew, Robin.  I wish I knew!