When did I get old? I can remember when my mother was part of the planning committee for her high school class's 50th reunion, and all I could think was, "Dang! That's old!" And now, my turn came. The Class of '65 of Oak Park-River Forest High School in Oak Park, IL, had it's 50th reunion last month. A good time was had by all....I guess. I didn't go.
Why didn't I go?
Let's start with the fact that it's a 4-hour trip to Oak Park. The reunion was for the entire weekend. I could have stayed at my daughter's overnight both nights and driven back to OP for the activities, but I had just been up there. I would have had to go alone, and since alcohol was offered, I knew I wouldn't be able to imbibe and still drive after. I haven't really been back to OP much since my parents retired back in 1975, and although I think I could probably still navigate the community (with help), I wasn't confident that I could do so easily.
I looked at the "who's coming" list and didn't see a single person I was close to back then. Why? I wasn't close to very many people! There were 830+ kids in my graduating class. I was in classes with 100% of the reunion attendees over the four years of high school, but I can count on the fingers of one hand the ones I was "social" with...and most of those, unfortunately, were on the "In Memory" list. A couple of others were on the list of "Missing Classmates".
And then there is the issue of health and appearances. I knew that my attendance at the reunion was going to be a mobility challenge for me, plus the fact that I look NOTHING like I did back then. I didn't need the indignity of people not recognizing me...not that they would, anyway! (The only reason anyone would know I existed is due to the fact that I had the lead role in both plays and the musical during my Senior year. I was pretty quiet in those days.) It's just not the same as being part of a class in a smaller or more rural area. Thus, I stayed home.
Yesterday, I got a notice that reunion pictures were posted online. I went through them all. What did I see? I saw a bunch of old people that I would not have recognized had they not been labeled! The one that was most surprising to me was a pic of our "star" tenor in A Capella Choir. He is HUGE! I saw him back at the 25th reunion which I did attend. What a change! Then, too, there was the football hunk that my best friend had a crush on way back when. He looked like a charicature of Caspar Milquetoast. Obviously, life hasn't been any better to him in appearance than it has been to me!!
As I mentioned, I did go to the 25th reunion with my then-husband. He was hot-and-heavy into his affair with his secretary back then and really didn't want to be there with me. He came from a very small school in Fillmore, IN, and could neither understand my big-school experience nor give me any props for what I accomplished there. His one comment was that he could see how "someone" could get a big head from a place like that...meaning me. (Gee thanks!)
Because of my nomadic childhood as a Navy kid, I didn't make friends easily because having friends meant leaving them painfully behind at the next transfer. Like my mother, I never looked back. So when it came time for the 25th class reunion at OP-RFHS, I was looking at things as if they were magic. I think my thoughts were, "This really did happen. This place truly exists. I didn't just make it up in my mind." My parents left OP in '75, and I never went back after that. To this day, I think about those days as if they were something that no one else would comprehend. I get weary of trying to help others understand what it all meant to me when I'm not sure I get it myself. Oak Park was the first place I could call home (besides the family farm) because it was where we landed when Dad got on inactive duty with the Navy. I loved it.
Am I sad that I didn't attend the 50th reunion? Nope. Not even a little. Looks like they had a good time, whoever they are. God bless them all!
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