What are the normal methods of killing oneself? Slitting a wrist. Hanging. Gunshot. Deliberate drug overdose. Falling on a sword. Drawing a weapon on police. Deliberately driving the wrong way on an interstate highway. Have I missed any?
But what if you have no intention of killing yourself, yet do something stupid and public, and have your name and face plastered all over the Internet as a Bad Guy unworthy of redemption? Child molesters--or people merely accused of child molestation--are prime targets and become guilty in the Court of Public Opinion regardless of the facts. Lock him up and throw away the key! Hang him by his genitals--or even cut them off! I give you the case of the Jon Benet Ramsey murder. The little girl's parents were under so much suspicion that their lives as wage-earning citizens were basically over. The case has never been solved. The mother died of cancer before further DNA evidence exonerated the parents...but not before they had already been tried and convicted by the public. How does one carry on in life with that much of a bull's-eye painted on him/her?
The latest trending story on the Internet is about a Minnesota dentist who paid big bucks to an African safari company for a trophy hunt. He claims that, for all he knew, permits were obtained and all was well. He bagged a male lion and had it beheaded (probably for taxidermy purposes). I haven't followed the story closely because, frankly, I don't know how anyone could kill an animal as endangered as lions. Turns out that the lion he killed was a favorite in a preserve...collared and followed regularly. The lion was even named: Cecil. And the dentist's name is now Mudd!
He has issued an apology of sorts--to his patients--because guess what? This has received so much attention on the Internet that he can no longer conduct business. I suspect there have been threats on his life. His website has been taken down. He's had to refer his patients to other dentists. He's probably gone into hiding. He says he had no idea that the creature that he killed was a local favorite...but it doesn't matter. The animal is still dead, and the Internet is still humming about it. All of the animal rights people are irate. Essentially, the guy has committed virtual suicide, and the Internet was the weapon--all in the interest of his hunting hobby. (Reports say that he paid $50k Euro for the opportunity.)
There are lessons to be learned here. One is that we aren't alone. The Internet sees all. We can no longer assume that what we do isn't viewed by surveillance cameras or reported on Internet sites. Another is that we are no longer free in the world community to spout our Freedom of Speech rights without drawing the wrath of other countries who don't view us in the same way we view ourselves. Yet another--and this is a tough nut to crack--is that we, as a nation, have a chip on our shoulder. I shudder to think about how many Facebook posts I have seen from people who stand their ground, no matter whom they are offending, saying (in essence), if you don't like me, or our country, or our way of doing things, or the way I am raising my kids...or whatever...you can just LEAVE. I'm pretty sure that's not going to happen, so what is the message? Don't mess with me? You don't count? I'd rather have a trophy lion head than a career?
I'm not judging the guy. Whether or not he was aware of what he was doing when he killed that lion, life as he knew it is over, thanks to the Internet. Maybe we'll ALL learn something from it! The speed and connectivity of social media has changed society before we were ready for it, perhaps, but it is now the lay of the way things are. May God have mercy on all of us!!
Wednesday, July 29, 2015
Sunday, July 26, 2015
The Sting in Texting
My grandchildren are in town this week, without parents. This time is a little bit different than normal visits, however, in that they are under the supervision of their paternal grandparents who live just a mile from here. (This is a first!) Grandma Judy orchestrated the visit and has gone to great lengths to plan things for them all to do. I see myself as a grandparent pop-off valve for when the honeymoon wears off and everyone needs a break. I can take one as a divide-and-conquer strategy, or I can take them both for tag-team efforts. How do you spell relief? M-O-V-I-E! We'll see how things go.
Meanwhile, it should be noted that the children really didn't want to come. (Ryan especially resisted.) But doggone it, Grandma Judy and Grandpa Phil don't often get a chance to have the kids in their own clutches. While they appear to be in good health, they are both in their 70s. (Nuff sed on that!) And Megan and Denis don't often have a chance to be kid-free for a whole week. I encouraged her to send them, which she did....but she still frets about how the experience is going for them. And, unfortunately, she really is NOT kid-free this week. Why? Texting!
Understand that circumstances over the past few years have made a better parent out of my daughter. She needs for her children to feel comfortable enough to tell her things about their lives and their feelings so she will know how to help them. We all applaud that; HOWEVER, the advent of the cell phone has made it far too easy for kids to reach mama. I'm convinced that this generation is losing the ability to entertain themselves and/or figure out what to do in situations in which they find themselves...and FAR too easy to complain!
Today, the children complained to their mother that they were forced to go to church. This is true. Phil and Judy are stalwart members of our church, both as regular attenders and leaders. They made their own children go to church; why should their grandchildren be any different?? (There is also a brag-factor at play here. Other people's children/grandchildren live closer and show up at church often. Ours are only around a couple of times a year. I know I am so proud to have them with me in worship. I imagine the other grandparents feel the same.) The kids complained even more about having to go to Sunday School because Judy and I attend the adult version of that, too. Guess what? Nobody died! After church, Ryan came home with me for the 1 1/2 hours before we were all to meet at a Japanese Teppanyaki restaurant...then the kids were taken swimming at Splash Island here in Plainfield (which, btw, made a "best pools in the country" list).
But the complaints didn't stop. Apparently Ryan was pestering his sister, and she was indignant. Not sure if she complained to her grandparents, but she sure did tattle to Mommy in text. Mommy is 200 miles away. Grandma is somewhere in the same house. What's the point? Do they just need to complain to see who is listening, or do they really expect Mommy to be able to fix it?
I'm torn. I want the best for my grandchildren, but I'd also like to see my daughter and her husband also enjoy life with the kids. I would die for them all. I would die without them. But does the cell phone represent the real part of life? I don't think so.
To be brutally honest, I did the same thing to my own mother, except I was an adult when I did. When my husband was being a jerk, I called her to talk about it. In time, I noticed that she got quieter and quieter. I think she realized that things were more critical than her guidance could help, yet I still looked to her for relief. And then she died and I was thrust into being a Big Girl before I felt ready. Thank God we didn't have texting in those days! She probably would have shut her phone off!
The week has only just begun. The grandkids will feel inconvenienced because they aren't in their own surroundings and can't control what goes on. I was a kid once. I get it, but it's time to suck up for just a little bit. Maybe it's time to text the fun and happy things??
Meanwhile, it should be noted that the children really didn't want to come. (Ryan especially resisted.) But doggone it, Grandma Judy and Grandpa Phil don't often get a chance to have the kids in their own clutches. While they appear to be in good health, they are both in their 70s. (Nuff sed on that!) And Megan and Denis don't often have a chance to be kid-free for a whole week. I encouraged her to send them, which she did....but she still frets about how the experience is going for them. And, unfortunately, she really is NOT kid-free this week. Why? Texting!
Understand that circumstances over the past few years have made a better parent out of my daughter. She needs for her children to feel comfortable enough to tell her things about their lives and their feelings so she will know how to help them. We all applaud that; HOWEVER, the advent of the cell phone has made it far too easy for kids to reach mama. I'm convinced that this generation is losing the ability to entertain themselves and/or figure out what to do in situations in which they find themselves...and FAR too easy to complain!
Today, the children complained to their mother that they were forced to go to church. This is true. Phil and Judy are stalwart members of our church, both as regular attenders and leaders. They made their own children go to church; why should their grandchildren be any different?? (There is also a brag-factor at play here. Other people's children/grandchildren live closer and show up at church often. Ours are only around a couple of times a year. I know I am so proud to have them with me in worship. I imagine the other grandparents feel the same.) The kids complained even more about having to go to Sunday School because Judy and I attend the adult version of that, too. Guess what? Nobody died! After church, Ryan came home with me for the 1 1/2 hours before we were all to meet at a Japanese Teppanyaki restaurant...then the kids were taken swimming at Splash Island here in Plainfield (which, btw, made a "best pools in the country" list).
But the complaints didn't stop. Apparently Ryan was pestering his sister, and she was indignant. Not sure if she complained to her grandparents, but she sure did tattle to Mommy in text. Mommy is 200 miles away. Grandma is somewhere in the same house. What's the point? Do they just need to complain to see who is listening, or do they really expect Mommy to be able to fix it?
I'm torn. I want the best for my grandchildren, but I'd also like to see my daughter and her husband also enjoy life with the kids. I would die for them all. I would die without them. But does the cell phone represent the real part of life? I don't think so.
To be brutally honest, I did the same thing to my own mother, except I was an adult when I did. When my husband was being a jerk, I called her to talk about it. In time, I noticed that she got quieter and quieter. I think she realized that things were more critical than her guidance could help, yet I still looked to her for relief. And then she died and I was thrust into being a Big Girl before I felt ready. Thank God we didn't have texting in those days! She probably would have shut her phone off!
The week has only just begun. The grandkids will feel inconvenienced because they aren't in their own surroundings and can't control what goes on. I was a kid once. I get it, but it's time to suck up for just a little bit. Maybe it's time to text the fun and happy things??
Sunday, July 19, 2015
What Every Politician Knows...
Here we go. We are beginning a presidential campaign year, and I'm not sure I will survive it without shutting off the TV and not looking at Facebook. My blood pressure goes up significantly when I hear about insane commentary from people who would be president. And I wonder, "Is this for real???"
Before I became an adult, the only things I knew about politics came from my parents. We were not a political family. The first lesson came from my dad who stated, without question, that the Commander-in-Chief of the nation was The Boss, regardless of political party. Dad was an officer in the Navy. He never, ever, voiced his displeasure at decisions coming from The Boss. (At least not in front of us kids.) Long after he retired and the rest of us became adults, he would defend presidents under attack by saying, mostly, that the Prez didn't do anything that others hadn't done, etc. It seems that Dad's whole "thing" in life was about respect. I understood.
The second lesson came from Mom when I was running for JCL (Junior Civic League) President at my elementary school. At first, I was just going to run for secretary, but Mom urged me to go for the gusto...so I did. In the process of campaigning against several other candidates--all boys--she advised me that I would win. When I asked her how she could be so sure, she said, "The girls will all vote for you, but the boys' vote will be split among the male candidates." She was right. At least she was right in the notion that I would win because I did, although I never was privileged to know exactly how the vote went. That was, however, my first clue that election results are not merely based on the merits of who is the best person for the job.
I was a sheltered and naive kid, raised during the Cold War with the USSR. I believed that God was on our side and that "right makes might". MY country would never be involved in espionage. MY country would never torture prisoners. MY country would not use propaganda to tweak the public's thinking. See where I am going with this? I was a patriot, and still am, although I'm not as oblivious now. It never occurred to me back then that people in other countries felt the same way about their own governments and wanted the same things that Americans did/do. Duh!
And now I am learning what every politician already knows:
1. Take advantage of the media. Every chance you get, use it to your advantage.
2. Religion and patriotism gain votes. If you use God and Country in your campaign, you will find an audience, regardless of what that means.
3. Find out who your supporters are based on whose ox is gored. Big money lobbyists hold a lot of power. The NRA and the NEA, et al, are forces to be reckoned with.
4. Use every single bit of dirt that you can find on any opposing candidate and play it out in the media. Make a big deal out of it.
5. Do whatever you need to do to disarm the voting public so that they are forced to do their homework, knowing that most won't.
Yesterday, I read with interest the brain dribblings of Donald Trump, would-be presidential candidate for the Republican Party. He has shot off his mouth over illegal alien issues in the past. (A knee-jerk domestic topic.) Yesterday, however, he said that John McCain, a veteran and former POW and former presidential candidate, was only a hero because he got captured during Vietnam. This from a candidate who claims to be standing up for veterans. And it occurred to me that he was doing more damage to the GOP than they would probably allow a candidate from their party. I mean, no one in their right mind would vote for the dude, but he is at the top of the polls for GOP candidates. (Not sure how many others have thrown their hats in the ring yet.)
And then it hit: the GOP is letting Loose-Cannon Trump do his thing because he is bringing free media attention to them. He is the decoy against whom the other potential candidates can claim reason and logic. He is "drawing the foul" for the rest of the team. There is no way he could win the GOP's nod as their candidate because there is no way that he could win the election. But can he create diversions and make the nation focus on domestic issues rather than international ones? You betcha!
What else do politicians know? They know that the voters will not do their homework and vote for someone who actually stands for their issues. I'm not assured that voters actually know what their issues are! I know mine. I consider myself a political independent, but I have seen enough of the GOP to know that I will not vote Republican again until they address my issues. What are my issues? I am female...was a single parent...mother of a female who was sometimes in need of welfare..and grandmother of a female. A woman who wants abortion rights...retired teacher in American public education under attack...supporter of female-led families who can't make ends meet.
God blessed me with a brain. Come election time, I intend to use it. Not every politician knows about me!
Before I became an adult, the only things I knew about politics came from my parents. We were not a political family. The first lesson came from my dad who stated, without question, that the Commander-in-Chief of the nation was The Boss, regardless of political party. Dad was an officer in the Navy. He never, ever, voiced his displeasure at decisions coming from The Boss. (At least not in front of us kids.) Long after he retired and the rest of us became adults, he would defend presidents under attack by saying, mostly, that the Prez didn't do anything that others hadn't done, etc. It seems that Dad's whole "thing" in life was about respect. I understood.
The second lesson came from Mom when I was running for JCL (Junior Civic League) President at my elementary school. At first, I was just going to run for secretary, but Mom urged me to go for the gusto...so I did. In the process of campaigning against several other candidates--all boys--she advised me that I would win. When I asked her how she could be so sure, she said, "The girls will all vote for you, but the boys' vote will be split among the male candidates." She was right. At least she was right in the notion that I would win because I did, although I never was privileged to know exactly how the vote went. That was, however, my first clue that election results are not merely based on the merits of who is the best person for the job.
I was a sheltered and naive kid, raised during the Cold War with the USSR. I believed that God was on our side and that "right makes might". MY country would never be involved in espionage. MY country would never torture prisoners. MY country would not use propaganda to tweak the public's thinking. See where I am going with this? I was a patriot, and still am, although I'm not as oblivious now. It never occurred to me back then that people in other countries felt the same way about their own governments and wanted the same things that Americans did/do. Duh!
And now I am learning what every politician already knows:
1. Take advantage of the media. Every chance you get, use it to your advantage.
2. Religion and patriotism gain votes. If you use God and Country in your campaign, you will find an audience, regardless of what that means.
3. Find out who your supporters are based on whose ox is gored. Big money lobbyists hold a lot of power. The NRA and the NEA, et al, are forces to be reckoned with.
4. Use every single bit of dirt that you can find on any opposing candidate and play it out in the media. Make a big deal out of it.
5. Do whatever you need to do to disarm the voting public so that they are forced to do their homework, knowing that most won't.
Yesterday, I read with interest the brain dribblings of Donald Trump, would-be presidential candidate for the Republican Party. He has shot off his mouth over illegal alien issues in the past. (A knee-jerk domestic topic.) Yesterday, however, he said that John McCain, a veteran and former POW and former presidential candidate, was only a hero because he got captured during Vietnam. This from a candidate who claims to be standing up for veterans. And it occurred to me that he was doing more damage to the GOP than they would probably allow a candidate from their party. I mean, no one in their right mind would vote for the dude, but he is at the top of the polls for GOP candidates. (Not sure how many others have thrown their hats in the ring yet.)
And then it hit: the GOP is letting Loose-Cannon Trump do his thing because he is bringing free media attention to them. He is the decoy against whom the other potential candidates can claim reason and logic. He is "drawing the foul" for the rest of the team. There is no way he could win the GOP's nod as their candidate because there is no way that he could win the election. But can he create diversions and make the nation focus on domestic issues rather than international ones? You betcha!
What else do politicians know? They know that the voters will not do their homework and vote for someone who actually stands for their issues. I'm not assured that voters actually know what their issues are! I know mine. I consider myself a political independent, but I have seen enough of the GOP to know that I will not vote Republican again until they address my issues. What are my issues? I am female...was a single parent...mother of a female who was sometimes in need of welfare..and grandmother of a female. A woman who wants abortion rights...retired teacher in American public education under attack...supporter of female-led families who can't make ends meet.
God blessed me with a brain. Come election time, I intend to use it. Not every politician knows about me!
Saturday, July 18, 2015
50th Class Reunion
When did I get old? I can remember when my mother was part of the planning committee for her high school class's 50th reunion, and all I could think was, "Dang! That's old!" And now, my turn came. The Class of '65 of Oak Park-River Forest High School in Oak Park, IL, had it's 50th reunion last month. A good time was had by all....I guess. I didn't go.
Why didn't I go?
Let's start with the fact that it's a 4-hour trip to Oak Park. The reunion was for the entire weekend. I could have stayed at my daughter's overnight both nights and driven back to OP for the activities, but I had just been up there. I would have had to go alone, and since alcohol was offered, I knew I wouldn't be able to imbibe and still drive after. I haven't really been back to OP much since my parents retired back in 1975, and although I think I could probably still navigate the community (with help), I wasn't confident that I could do so easily.
I looked at the "who's coming" list and didn't see a single person I was close to back then. Why? I wasn't close to very many people! There were 830+ kids in my graduating class. I was in classes with 100% of the reunion attendees over the four years of high school, but I can count on the fingers of one hand the ones I was "social" with...and most of those, unfortunately, were on the "In Memory" list. A couple of others were on the list of "Missing Classmates".
And then there is the issue of health and appearances. I knew that my attendance at the reunion was going to be a mobility challenge for me, plus the fact that I look NOTHING like I did back then. I didn't need the indignity of people not recognizing me...not that they would, anyway! (The only reason anyone would know I existed is due to the fact that I had the lead role in both plays and the musical during my Senior year. I was pretty quiet in those days.) It's just not the same as being part of a class in a smaller or more rural area. Thus, I stayed home.
Yesterday, I got a notice that reunion pictures were posted online. I went through them all. What did I see? I saw a bunch of old people that I would not have recognized had they not been labeled! The one that was most surprising to me was a pic of our "star" tenor in A Capella Choir. He is HUGE! I saw him back at the 25th reunion which I did attend. What a change! Then, too, there was the football hunk that my best friend had a crush on way back when. He looked like a charicature of Caspar Milquetoast. Obviously, life hasn't been any better to him in appearance than it has been to me!!
As I mentioned, I did go to the 25th reunion with my then-husband. He was hot-and-heavy into his affair with his secretary back then and really didn't want to be there with me. He came from a very small school in Fillmore, IN, and could neither understand my big-school experience nor give me any props for what I accomplished there. His one comment was that he could see how "someone" could get a big head from a place like that...meaning me. (Gee thanks!)
Because of my nomadic childhood as a Navy kid, I didn't make friends easily because having friends meant leaving them painfully behind at the next transfer. Like my mother, I never looked back. So when it came time for the 25th class reunion at OP-RFHS, I was looking at things as if they were magic. I think my thoughts were, "This really did happen. This place truly exists. I didn't just make it up in my mind." My parents left OP in '75, and I never went back after that. To this day, I think about those days as if they were something that no one else would comprehend. I get weary of trying to help others understand what it all meant to me when I'm not sure I get it myself. Oak Park was the first place I could call home (besides the family farm) because it was where we landed when Dad got on inactive duty with the Navy. I loved it.
Am I sad that I didn't attend the 50th reunion? Nope. Not even a little. Looks like they had a good time, whoever they are. God bless them all!
Why didn't I go?
Let's start with the fact that it's a 4-hour trip to Oak Park. The reunion was for the entire weekend. I could have stayed at my daughter's overnight both nights and driven back to OP for the activities, but I had just been up there. I would have had to go alone, and since alcohol was offered, I knew I wouldn't be able to imbibe and still drive after. I haven't really been back to OP much since my parents retired back in 1975, and although I think I could probably still navigate the community (with help), I wasn't confident that I could do so easily.
I looked at the "who's coming" list and didn't see a single person I was close to back then. Why? I wasn't close to very many people! There were 830+ kids in my graduating class. I was in classes with 100% of the reunion attendees over the four years of high school, but I can count on the fingers of one hand the ones I was "social" with...and most of those, unfortunately, were on the "In Memory" list. A couple of others were on the list of "Missing Classmates".
And then there is the issue of health and appearances. I knew that my attendance at the reunion was going to be a mobility challenge for me, plus the fact that I look NOTHING like I did back then. I didn't need the indignity of people not recognizing me...not that they would, anyway! (The only reason anyone would know I existed is due to the fact that I had the lead role in both plays and the musical during my Senior year. I was pretty quiet in those days.) It's just not the same as being part of a class in a smaller or more rural area. Thus, I stayed home.
Yesterday, I got a notice that reunion pictures were posted online. I went through them all. What did I see? I saw a bunch of old people that I would not have recognized had they not been labeled! The one that was most surprising to me was a pic of our "star" tenor in A Capella Choir. He is HUGE! I saw him back at the 25th reunion which I did attend. What a change! Then, too, there was the football hunk that my best friend had a crush on way back when. He looked like a charicature of Caspar Milquetoast. Obviously, life hasn't been any better to him in appearance than it has been to me!!
As I mentioned, I did go to the 25th reunion with my then-husband. He was hot-and-heavy into his affair with his secretary back then and really didn't want to be there with me. He came from a very small school in Fillmore, IN, and could neither understand my big-school experience nor give me any props for what I accomplished there. His one comment was that he could see how "someone" could get a big head from a place like that...meaning me. (Gee thanks!)
Because of my nomadic childhood as a Navy kid, I didn't make friends easily because having friends meant leaving them painfully behind at the next transfer. Like my mother, I never looked back. So when it came time for the 25th class reunion at OP-RFHS, I was looking at things as if they were magic. I think my thoughts were, "This really did happen. This place truly exists. I didn't just make it up in my mind." My parents left OP in '75, and I never went back after that. To this day, I think about those days as if they were something that no one else would comprehend. I get weary of trying to help others understand what it all meant to me when I'm not sure I get it myself. Oak Park was the first place I could call home (besides the family farm) because it was where we landed when Dad got on inactive duty with the Navy. I loved it.
Am I sad that I didn't attend the 50th reunion? Nope. Not even a little. Looks like they had a good time, whoever they are. God bless them all!
Thursday, July 16, 2015
What Were They Thinking?
Things happen in life that make one wonder what others are thinking. Here are some of mine:
While in high school, my daughter had a job in order to pay for the gas for her vehicle and create some discretionary income for herself. Things happened. Her hours got cut so she wasn't making as much money as she wanted...so she quit. My question to her then was, "So how much money are you making now?"
What was she thinking??
A "trending article" showed up on Facebook today...a video of a policeman who slammed a handcuffed young woman to the floor. On its face, the article seems current and excessive...but...the video is actually two years old and has only now been released as part of a lawsuit. As bad as it is, the woman was put in a chair in a hallway...and then proceeded to kick the policeman in the groin (or near it). That's when she got slammed to the floor. How many brains does it take to understand that you can't do stuff like that when you are in custody and handcuffed?
What was she thinking??
Once upon a time, my grandson needed/wanted to use the bathroom on the top floor of his house. His stepsister was in there and would not relinquish the room. He got angry and broke the door down. There were two other working bathrooms in the house that he could have used. As punishment, he had all of his privileges taken away for a very long time.
What was he thinking??
There was a big ol' moth fluttering at the window in a train car in the back of a property that my family had rented. I was a kid and was playing in there. I took off my shoe and smashed the moth on the window...breaking the window...obviously not understanding something like that would happen.
What was I thinking??
My daughter and son-in-law bought their lovely house a year ago with the notion that his parents from Russia would be living with them...and the home had a huge bedroom that would accommodate them. Several weeks ago, it was being explained to his mother that she would be staying in Ryan's room when coming to my house to visit for the Fourth, but she misunderstood. She somehow thought that she was being kicked out of the big bedroom at THEIR house. It took some doing to help her understand that she hadn't lost anything.
What was she thinking??
My once-husband and daughter were throwing a ball around in the family room. I asked them to stop, saying that they would likely knock over his beer on the end table. They assured me that I was nuts. The very next throw went off track and knocked the glass of beer all over the furniture.
What were they thinking??
Do you see where I'm going with this?
Call it Karma or instant justice or whatever...I just wish people would THINK before they do stuff!
While in high school, my daughter had a job in order to pay for the gas for her vehicle and create some discretionary income for herself. Things happened. Her hours got cut so she wasn't making as much money as she wanted...so she quit. My question to her then was, "So how much money are you making now?"
What was she thinking??
A "trending article" showed up on Facebook today...a video of a policeman who slammed a handcuffed young woman to the floor. On its face, the article seems current and excessive...but...the video is actually two years old and has only now been released as part of a lawsuit. As bad as it is, the woman was put in a chair in a hallway...and then proceeded to kick the policeman in the groin (or near it). That's when she got slammed to the floor. How many brains does it take to understand that you can't do stuff like that when you are in custody and handcuffed?
What was she thinking??
Once upon a time, my grandson needed/wanted to use the bathroom on the top floor of his house. His stepsister was in there and would not relinquish the room. He got angry and broke the door down. There were two other working bathrooms in the house that he could have used. As punishment, he had all of his privileges taken away for a very long time.
What was he thinking??
There was a big ol' moth fluttering at the window in a train car in the back of a property that my family had rented. I was a kid and was playing in there. I took off my shoe and smashed the moth on the window...breaking the window...obviously not understanding something like that would happen.
What was I thinking??
My daughter and son-in-law bought their lovely house a year ago with the notion that his parents from Russia would be living with them...and the home had a huge bedroom that would accommodate them. Several weeks ago, it was being explained to his mother that she would be staying in Ryan's room when coming to my house to visit for the Fourth, but she misunderstood. She somehow thought that she was being kicked out of the big bedroom at THEIR house. It took some doing to help her understand that she hadn't lost anything.
What was she thinking??
My once-husband and daughter were throwing a ball around in the family room. I asked them to stop, saying that they would likely knock over his beer on the end table. They assured me that I was nuts. The very next throw went off track and knocked the glass of beer all over the furniture.
What were they thinking??
Do you see where I'm going with this?
Call it Karma or instant justice or whatever...I just wish people would THINK before they do stuff!
Sunday, July 12, 2015
To Sleep, Perchance to Dream.
"To die, to sleep;
To sleep: perchance to dream: aye, there's the rub" ~~Shakespeare's Hamlet.
No one explained to me that when we get old, we don't sleep so well. My tribulations with sleep started when my daughter and grandchildren ingloriously moved out. I know I do a lot of things that contribute to my inability to sleep long term, but I refuse to medicate. It will work out, in time. I just do what I can. This week, I am probably averaging 3-5 hours per night. I'm not on a schedule, so there is no problem. If I get up at 3:00 AM to putter around until I get sleepy again, there is no one to make me feel guilty for doing so. It is what it is!!
Sleep is highly overrated! 'Tis a bit ironic that teenagers and young people crave it, and old people don't need it. What's up with that??
To sleep: perchance to dream: aye, there's the rub" ~~Shakespeare's Hamlet.
No one explained to me that when we get old, we don't sleep so well. My tribulations with sleep started when my daughter and grandchildren ingloriously moved out. I know I do a lot of things that contribute to my inability to sleep long term, but I refuse to medicate. It will work out, in time. I just do what I can. This week, I am probably averaging 3-5 hours per night. I'm not on a schedule, so there is no problem. If I get up at 3:00 AM to putter around until I get sleepy again, there is no one to make me feel guilty for doing so. It is what it is!!
Sleep is highly overrated! 'Tis a bit ironic that teenagers and young people crave it, and old people don't need it. What's up with that??
My Fourth of July Complaint
Christmas was meant for children. So is the Fourth of July. Family activities filled with fun and family that make memories to last a lifetime. Except for my grandkids, apparently!
At the very least, the Fourth must have public fireworks...and personal sparklers. I had them as a kid. Looked forward to them, in fact. Fun after dark! And ever since my grandchildren were old enough to manage them, I've bought sparklers for us to play with on the patio. It was always a happy--but watchful--occasion. But...this year....what happened? Have the children outgrown sparklers????? The grown-ups haven't. I'm crushed!
Everyone got home too late in the Fourth to legally imbibe with the sparklers, although they don't make noise. We were all quite tired...so...I saved the sparklers (this year's and ones left over from two years ago) for the 5th. When it came time to go to the patio to play, Denis was ready. Luda was ready. Robin said she'd participate. Ryan, however, was in a mood and at odds with his mother, so he opted out. Robin came out and did ONE sparkler. Period. Denis and Luda--both Russian-born and not necessarily into the whole fireworks thing--burned quite a few...and then, as there was no one else to enjoy them with us, gave up and went to bed.
Am I so doggone old-fashioned that I'm not up on the trends of today? Seriously, what red-blooded American kid would pass up a chance to play with sparklers? What did I miss??
Now I am wondering if the mentality about the "happy patio event" has anything to do with the "happy Christmas tree decorating" events. When I was a kid, decorating the Christmas tree was a family effort. In my mind, we enjoyed it. It wasn't filled with hot chocolate and other delightful things, but we decorated our tree as a family (minus Dad whose job it was to put up the tree and put on the lights, and then sit back to let us do the rest. Although he didn't take part, he was present and encouraging). When I became a mother, I tried to re-create those days...attempted to make decorating the tree special. No matter how I tried, however, I couldn't get my then-husband to participate beyond setting up the tree. He would actually leave...but I apparently put up a good enough front that my daughter never knew how disappointed I was with that. What she remembered, and what she wanted to create for her children (and worked hard for), was a happy family event. Unfortunately, more than once, the kids were contentious and fussing with each other (probably due to fatigue), and Meg's response was to have a meltdown. She would dissolve into tears...and I think the kids remember that. Now, they don't want to have anything to do with decorating the family Christmas tree for fear of not behaving as expected. Or so it seems. I could be dead-wrong...but now I wonder if the same mentality follows the stupid sparkler tradition.
Okay. So I won't buy any more sparklers for the Fourth. I get the message: I'm a dinosaur. The bigger question is: How much would it hurt them to humor me? I won't be around that many more years. Soon enough, I will be gone, and I hope beyond hope that they will remember their time on Walton Drive as happy memories. If so, I can die happy!
At the very least, the Fourth must have public fireworks...and personal sparklers. I had them as a kid. Looked forward to them, in fact. Fun after dark! And ever since my grandchildren were old enough to manage them, I've bought sparklers for us to play with on the patio. It was always a happy--but watchful--occasion. But...this year....what happened? Have the children outgrown sparklers????? The grown-ups haven't. I'm crushed!
Everyone got home too late in the Fourth to legally imbibe with the sparklers, although they don't make noise. We were all quite tired...so...I saved the sparklers (this year's and ones left over from two years ago) for the 5th. When it came time to go to the patio to play, Denis was ready. Luda was ready. Robin said she'd participate. Ryan, however, was in a mood and at odds with his mother, so he opted out. Robin came out and did ONE sparkler. Period. Denis and Luda--both Russian-born and not necessarily into the whole fireworks thing--burned quite a few...and then, as there was no one else to enjoy them with us, gave up and went to bed.
Am I so doggone old-fashioned that I'm not up on the trends of today? Seriously, what red-blooded American kid would pass up a chance to play with sparklers? What did I miss??
Now I am wondering if the mentality about the "happy patio event" has anything to do with the "happy Christmas tree decorating" events. When I was a kid, decorating the Christmas tree was a family effort. In my mind, we enjoyed it. It wasn't filled with hot chocolate and other delightful things, but we decorated our tree as a family (minus Dad whose job it was to put up the tree and put on the lights, and then sit back to let us do the rest. Although he didn't take part, he was present and encouraging). When I became a mother, I tried to re-create those days...attempted to make decorating the tree special. No matter how I tried, however, I couldn't get my then-husband to participate beyond setting up the tree. He would actually leave...but I apparently put up a good enough front that my daughter never knew how disappointed I was with that. What she remembered, and what she wanted to create for her children (and worked hard for), was a happy family event. Unfortunately, more than once, the kids were contentious and fussing with each other (probably due to fatigue), and Meg's response was to have a meltdown. She would dissolve into tears...and I think the kids remember that. Now, they don't want to have anything to do with decorating the family Christmas tree for fear of not behaving as expected. Or so it seems. I could be dead-wrong...but now I wonder if the same mentality follows the stupid sparkler tradition.
Okay. So I won't buy any more sparklers for the Fourth. I get the message: I'm a dinosaur. The bigger question is: How much would it hurt them to humor me? I won't be around that many more years. Soon enough, I will be gone, and I hope beyond hope that they will remember their time on Walton Drive as happy memories. If so, I can die happy!
Wednesday, July 8, 2015
My Fourth of July
I will spare the gory details of every single thing that happened at my house over the Fourth weekend with my family here, plus Russian grandma. Suffice it to say, we were busy! The children went to Sky Zone (the trampoline place) and Splash Island (the local pool) thanks to their stepfather. And for the actual Fourth activities, we were all split. Megan and Denis and the children went to a street concert in Indy--something that Robin wanted to do--while Grandma Luda and I went to Hummel Park with Grandma Judy and Grandpa Phil for our very own Symphony on the Prairie. Plus fireworks.
Hummel is just down the street from my house. The band shell, etc., is on the back side of the park, so we endeavored to go early to get a good parking spot, but we weren't early enough. It all worked out. I used my rollator, so all was well.
What we encountered at the park was the Hendricks County Symphony, playing "patriotic pops". I loved it all! There wasn't anything they played that was strange to me....The National Anthem, God Bless America, the military medley that needed veterans to stand up, show tunes, etc...but the last set (the one I loved the most) was the 1812 Overture, the William Tell Overture, a couple of Sousa marches (Washington Post March...and one other), ending with The Stars and Stripes Forever. Wow! The fireworks began just where the cannon fire would have happened in the 1812 Overture. I got goose bumps! And Stars and Stripes Forever ended just before the end of the fireworks--a finale that was absolutely fantastic. Better than ever before! And lest the fireworks end without musical accompaniment, the PA piped in "Born in the USA".
To be brutally honest, I looked at this experience as my last. If it is, I was blessed! Luda claimed to enjoy herself. Judy and Phil are steadfast. The other faction of the family apparently had a great time, in spite of perceived challenges about seating and places to watch fireworks. It all happened as it should have!
In the end, no one went hungry. No one got left out. Everyone got to celebrate the day as they chose.
God Bless America...and God Bless my family!
Hummel is just down the street from my house. The band shell, etc., is on the back side of the park, so we endeavored to go early to get a good parking spot, but we weren't early enough. It all worked out. I used my rollator, so all was well.
What we encountered at the park was the Hendricks County Symphony, playing "patriotic pops". I loved it all! There wasn't anything they played that was strange to me....The National Anthem, God Bless America, the military medley that needed veterans to stand up, show tunes, etc...but the last set (the one I loved the most) was the 1812 Overture, the William Tell Overture, a couple of Sousa marches (Washington Post March...and one other), ending with The Stars and Stripes Forever. Wow! The fireworks began just where the cannon fire would have happened in the 1812 Overture. I got goose bumps! And Stars and Stripes Forever ended just before the end of the fireworks--a finale that was absolutely fantastic. Better than ever before! And lest the fireworks end without musical accompaniment, the PA piped in "Born in the USA".
To be brutally honest, I looked at this experience as my last. If it is, I was blessed! Luda claimed to enjoy herself. Judy and Phil are steadfast. The other faction of the family apparently had a great time, in spite of perceived challenges about seating and places to watch fireworks. It all happened as it should have!
In the end, no one went hungry. No one got left out. Everyone got to celebrate the day as they chose.
God Bless America...and God Bless my family!