Sunday, July 16, 2006

The Great Weekend Kid Trade Experiment

For the year since my daughter and family moved to Muncie, we often have what Little Miss Robin calls "sleepovers".  I frequently spend the night there when I visit.  Once in awhile, Meg and the children will spend the night here.  What we have never done, because of the young age of the children, is have the children sleep over for a weekend without their parents.  Although it was my idea to try it, I honestly haven't been willing to take both children for two nights by myself.  The other grandparents, who also live in Plainfield, agreed to try it with me...and this weekend was chosen. 

At issue were:

1.  Could the children survive a weekend without their parents without getting homesick?  Apparently so.  Ryan was the only one that exhibited any homesickness, but not much.

2.  Would the children be able to sleep in "strange" surroundings without a major disrupt to their schedules?  Yes...and no.  Robin has slept with me a number of times in the "bumpy bed" (waterbed), but won't go to sleep until I hit the sack, too..  Ryan has never slept in the waterbed, but he made a nest for himself (snack, sippy-cup, nightlight, and Dora video) and eventually conked off on his own.  Neither of them has been to sleep on schedule, however.

3.  Could the two grandmothers manage to keep the children entertained without wearing ourselves out?  Ask me tomorrow! 

The short course is that Robin would sleep here with me on Friday night; we would do activities together today; and tonight, we would trade children, with Ryan sleeping at my house.  So far, so good!  Because it was too hot for the grandmothers today, we decided against the zoo; and because Black Expo is in town, we figured the Children's Museum would be overcrowded--so we took the kids to see a "moozie:"  Cars.  It was cute, but way over the kids' heads.  Still, they behaved well, having been plied with popcorn and Twizzlers.  After that, we took them to Cookie Cutter for haircuts and playing on the in-store slide.  Then, at Robin's direction, we went to McDonald's in Plainfield (with the indoor play area) and fed them supper--or tried to.  They were too busy running around to eat much.  All in all, I'd say they had a pretty big day!

Tomorrow, Ryan and I will meet the other grandparents and Robin at church for Sunday School and worship, then will decide how they are to get home.  (It hasn't been decided if Meg and Nathan will come up to get them, or if grandparent(s) will take them home.) 

What have I learned?  The weekend deal worked for just that--a weekend.  The children, collectively, aren't ready for longer (nor are the grandparents!).  And I think both the other grandparents and I agree that, except in an emergency, we aren't willing to take on both children at one home, alone, for an entire weekend.  (Perhaps when they are less attention intensive!) 

What else have I learned?  Robin functions fine without her baby brother, although she talks about him when he's not around.  Ryan seems more lost without his sister.  (When they were reunited today, they dashed into each other's arms in a mutual hug that was really cute!)  Robin, who generally favors me because she sees me more, can shift to the other grandmother with no difficulty at all.  Ryan, who adores Grandpa Phil, had a little trouble leaving Grandpa to come to stay at my house tonight, especially when Robin was getting to be there... 

One of the things I am extremely proud of is how well I get along with my son-in-law's family, which is good for the grandchildren.  Judy and I have different styles of parenting/grandparenting.  She is the "softer" grandmother.  She does crafts and thinks of all kinds of special little things for the children.  Softspoken and loving, she is a detail person.  I, however, am the more practical grandma, with a tougher skin.  I see the children more, because I am single.  If there is ANY hint of jealousy on the part of either of us, I simply don't see it!  When the Heffelman grandparents do something fun with/for our grandchildren, I see it as an advantage for the kids.  Judy and Phil have included me in their holiday family occasions, and I have done the same with them.  They have accepted my daughter as their own and are good, honest, Christian people whom I respect.  Robin and Ryan are a couple of lucky kids to have so many people who love them.  It makes all the difference in the world!

The little dude is asleep in the bumpy bed.  I should join him soon.  Last night, there were three in the bed--Robin, me, and the dawg.  Guess who was squashed in the middle??

(Whenever I talk about the bumpy bed, I am reminded of John Denver's song, Grandma's Feather Bed.  I sang it to Robin last night.  She said I was silly, but that was just before she told me, after getting out of the bathtub, that she was a "big glob of slippery soap"...and I said SHE was silly!)

Good night!

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