Each day is another adventure in sadness. I don't know what I...or my grandchildren...did to deserve what we got, but life goes on, dammit. The sun came up this morning. I went to cardiac rehab and got my hair cut. Tomorrow, Grandma Judy is coming over to render support in getting the house ready for the children.
The children! Robin and Ryan are to be allowed to be here from this coming Saturday morning until Sunday morning! Ryan had wet the bed the last night he was here, so I need to get his bedding washed. Need to get food in the house. Already contacted Jack to make sure he would be here. Need to do more laundry to get the children's clothes packed for Muncie. I miss them so much! Everything in the house speaks of my loss. I hope to make it a place of welcome to my grandchildren. They deserve better than they got.
I'll stick around for awhile. Have thought about leaving this place, but can't imagine leaving the grandchildren. They don't need any more trauma. God will provide the direction. Thank Him for my friends. I don't know how I could continue were it not for them, and my sister. Can't speak for my daughter...
I just survive. As Megan would say, "so dramatic".
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