Angry

I think I am over being shocked at how some Americans think.

Those who try to dig up sexual dirt on presidential candidates can no longer think that will change anything because Donald Trump is President.  There is/was all kinds of dirt about him.  Still is.  He was elected anyway.

Those who try to play the religion card can no longer hope to hold the faithful's attention because the hypocrisy of what they say they believe contrasts so drastically from what they vote for is enormous, with Donald Trump at the helm as President.

The whole COVID-19 thing has brought us to our knees.  Now, people who are getting tired of helping others are willing to trash everything the experts say in favor of their Constitutional rights.  Well...guess what?  The virus hasn't read the Constitution.  Go out and do what you want, fellow Americans.  I hope to God you don't catch the virus.  And because Donald Trump is President, you can follow his example.  And just what is his example?  Pretend that the situation doesn't exist?  Act like it will all go away?  Blame everyone for the microscopic existence among us?  Not wear a mask because it will make you look ridiculous?  Okay.  Go for it.  I hope God blesses you with good health, because Donald Trump is President and he wants the economy to improve.  And he (and other politicians) are willing to sacrifice lives to improve the economy, because that was what Mr. Trump's claim to fame is, and it has tanked due to the whole virus thing.  (Please...I am aware that our current situation is quite complicated.  People are frustrated, including me, but cooler heads need to prevail.  Cavorting around state capitols carrying guns and flying flags isn't going to make the virus go away.) 
You will have to forgive the analogy, but it's true:  When the AIDS plague was among us (still is), the message was that people who weren't in monogamous relationships were playing with fire.  If you were having unprotected sexual relations with people, whomever you had sexual relations with thereafter, were, in theory, also your unchosen sexual partners.  And so it is with COVID-19.  Your choice to go out into the world without a mask makes it more difficult for me--a highly at-risk person--to live a normal life.  In so very many months, only one person besides me has been in my house, and that is the technician that services my furnace/AC.  Your "right" to be out in public without protection shouldn't conflict with my "right" to exist.

I am desperately lonely.  I miss my family so much.  Had to cancel three trips, one of which was to be present for my granddaughter's graduation from high school.  I will miss my sister's wedding and a chance to see Baltimore with a treasured friend.  I know other people are suffering as much or more than I, but my self-pity is turning to anger.  I still have enough money to help others and be alert to the needs of others, but I am getting weary of the rhetoric that doesn't seem to care about me.

To those who are claiming that masks don't work, I say, "So I guess it's okay if the surgeon who operates on you doesn't wear a mask?"

To those who are claiming that only medical grade masks are helpful, I say, "I would love to have a couple of those but they just aren't available to the general public."  I've looked.

To those who are storming state capitals--the Trumpers among us--especially the women who are carrying signs that say "MY BODY, MY CHOICE" about wearing masks, I say, "Are you that passionate about women's abortion issues, also?"  If you are a pro-lifer, is it only unborn children that you want to protect, but let the elderly die of the virus because you don't want to wear a mask?  Do you pick and choose whose life to be pro?  Does "My Body, My Choice" come to a roaring halt with pregnancy?  I'm confused...

I'm beyond tired of this.  I'm angry.  Doesn't matter.  I don't count because I am old.  Unless I am standing on the capitol steps with a weapon and a Confederate flag in my hands, who cares?  I'm doing my best to keep my sanity in the lonely quiet of my little house-on-a-slab.  Carry on, if you can.